Cliff notes of the Jason Genova saga

Cliff notes of the Jason Genova Saga


Jason Genova is always running, running, running, toward his destiny! Where will he end up in his epic bodybuilding journey? Genova's Witnesses have been tuning in to the ultimate underdog story for over a decade to find out.

My Story Era (July 2009 - November 2012)

-In summer 2009, a chubby boy named Jason Genova uploads a video to YouTube called My Storie Part 1 where he proclaims his desire to become a pro bodybuilder. There seems to be something "off" about this young man, but nobody can quite put their finger on what. It's never explained why he calls himself "Jason Giovanni" in this video. His delusions and penchant for outrageous and unintentionally hilarious quotes make his videos a cult comedy hit. He and his crew (Jonas, Joey Joe Joe and Angel J) continue to upload My Story videos, Jason starts calling out pro bodybuilders, and going on impromptu rants against his "haters". The first major event that propels Jason to fame is when he calls out bodybuilder Mark Alvisi, earning him attention from PJ Braun, Aaron Singerman, Ron Harris, and Layne Norton. At this time, Genova is somewhat well known on's Misc forum but is pretty much unknown everywhere else. (My Storie Part 1)

-Jason earns his first arch-rival in Josh Foxx, who used to work at the Gold's Gym frequented by Genova. He constantly mocks Genova for all of his obvious deficiencies. The feud spans a solid year culminating in Josh making a mockumentary of Jason's "My Storie Part 1." Somewhat surprisingly, Josh Foxx receives an overwhelmingly negative response to this video, proving that Genova's Witnesses may enjoy poking fun at Jason, but deep down they are also protective of him from skinny haters like Josh Foxx. This is the beginning of the "no one is allowed to call Jason a retard except us" mentality adopted by his fans. (Josh Foxx's parody video)

-Jason claims that he competed in a bodybuilding show and took 3rd place in it, and he shows off his 3rd place medal on video. However, one viewer claims to have checked the record of the bodybuilding show that was named and didn't find Jason listed as one of the competitors. What's more, another viewer notices that Jason's medal does not actually say 3rd but rather '03, suggesting that it denotes the year 2003.

-Jason appears on a radio show with Aaron Singerman. He relays a message from Lee Priest who calls Jason out, calling him "retarded" and expressing doubt about his claims that he knows science. This sparks Jason's first ever celebrity feud. Jason insists that he's not retarded and says that he is now coming out of the closet about being ADD, ODD, and dyslexia, comparing himself to Lou Ferrigno. PJ Braun also calls into the show, marking Jason's innocuous first meeting with his future crush "PeeJay." (Radio interview part 1)
(Part 2)

-People begin to seriously question whether Genova is for real or if he's just a brilliant Andy Kaufman-esque troll. He releases a video where he's in a gazebo and says that he's about to demonstrate a "crescent kick", a move he learned from the 80s. "Nobody knows about this technique but me." He runs up to the gazebo railing, does a little hop, then awkwardly kicks his legs up backwards. The self proclaimed "former semi-pro UFC fighter" also shows off his own invention, the "palm kick", where he kicks and punches simultaneously for a devastating double blow. Oh how I wish this video was still around, it was possibly the funniest one of all time.

-A random man in the gym named Andrew agrees to film a brief cell phone video of Jason doing a set of leg press, but the relationship evolves to the point where Andrew gets roped into becoming Jason's regular camera man. He films videos of Jason working out in the gym rather than the documentary style My Story videos. Andrew's witty commentary and Jason's interactions with various members of the gym (many of whom are fascinating weirdos themselves) give the videos a strong sitcom style. It proves to be a winning formula and Genova's infamy continues to grow. (First video with Andrew)

-Even after Andrew becomes Jason's regular camera man, Jason and his old crew still occasionally release a new My Story installment, the newest ones being My Story Part 6 and My Story Part 7: Macho Man. The latter is quickly flagged and deleted by YouTube due to being inappropriate. Jason spends most of the video calling some girl with braces ugly ("I never wanna have kids with you, the kid will come out all ugly with braces on!"). He also mysteriously has a hillbilly accent for this one video. (My Story Part 7: Macho Man)

-Jason competes in a bodybuilding show in West Palm Beach. The footage of Jason posing on stage looks hilariously similar to an episode of the comedy show, Workaholics, where the character Adam DeMamp competes in a bodybuilding show. An incident also occurs where Jason gets horny as fuck and chases a bikini figure model across the stage while she's doing her routine. (Jason Genova's legendary posing routine)

-After finding out that Ron Harris has been mocking Jason, he calls out Ron for being on steroids. He even goes over to the Muscular Development forums and gets into a flame war with him, much to the amusement of all the spectators. Jason takes everything back, claiming that it was all "fun and games," possibly seeking a sponsorship from Gaspari Nutrition (who sponsor Ron).

-One of Jason's biggest "fans", Gideon, makes the trip all the way from England to hang out with The Spaniard for a day. Andrew and Gideon film the famous video at Target and McDonald's where they indulge The Spaniard's delusions for a day and he first demonstrates his incredible proficiency at scarfing down fast food at record speeds. He looks at the camera and pleads with Skip LaCour (his first ever celebrity coath) not to be mad because it's just a one-time cheat meal. (The famous Target and McDonald's video)

-Jason shows off his autographed Lou Ferrigno picture and claims that Lou is a big fan of his. After receiving criticism from fans for not knowing how to cook and eating the exact same three microwaved meals every day, The Iron Chef sets out to prove that he eats a wide variety of healthy foods and attempts to demonstrate by cooking some oatmeal. It becomes hilariously obvious that he has never cooked oatmeal in his life after he just sticks the dry oatmeal in the microwave without adding water and ends up burning it. (The oatmeal burning video)

-Jason trains (for free of course) with Skip LaCour, who previously had only given Jason coathing online and by phone. He gives Jason solid advice, diet and nutrition plans, and free personal training, all of which Jason ignores. (Video with Coath Skip)

-Jason actually meets up with his former nemesis Ron Harris. Jason trains with and receives advice from Ron, all of which he promptly ignores. (Video with Ron Harris)

-Jason competes in the "Abz of Adoniss" show at about 16% body fat, claiming to finish in 2nd place out of 3 competitors; the guy he finished ahead of had a torn bicep. In the post contest interview conducted by Andrew, the backwards-shirt-wearing Jason says that he did not expect to face such strong competition. When Andrew tells Jason that he should have expected to face competitors with good physiques at a bodybuilding show, Jason says his now legendary quote: "Yeah but sometimes nobody shows up and you automatically win." (Post-contest interview)

-Jason and Andrew arrive at Delray Fitness early in the morning to film their usual workout video, but the employee who unlocks the door hasn't shown up yet. They instead head over to 24 Hour Fitness, and Jason reads a letter on camera from a fan with a cuckolding fetish who wants his girlfriend to live with Jason for a while. They get kicked out of the gym for filming, and Andrew actually has his membership terminated. (The 24 Hour Fitness video)

-The alpha wolf of Delray Fitness, Big Richard, threatens to kill Jason and dump his body in the Everglades because he had been talking dirty to his daughter over Facebook the night before. Jason shrinks away and claims that he had no idea who the girl was. The next day, Jason arrives at the gym one hour late, conveniently after Big Richard has left, denies that he's avoiding Big Richard, and keeps showing up to the gym late, claiming that his alarm clock didn't go off. Eventually, Jason and Big Richard meet again and the two make up. Big Richard even offers to help Jason find a girl on Plenty Of Fish who'll suck his dick. (Big Richard expresses his displeasure at Genova)

PJ Braun Era (November 2012 - November 2013)

The dawn of the PJ Braun era, The infamous leg workout video at Busy Body Fitness

-Jason gets sponsored by a supplement company called Iron Mag Labs via PJ Braun and Aaron Singerman. The two had been longtime fans of Jason since 2009, and PJ had recently taken Jason through a leg workout video which left Jason collapsed on the ground grabbing his tallywacker and on the verge of vomiting. PJ and Aaron give him free supplements (including pro hormones) and offer him $1,000 if he wins a local bodybuilding show. (Jason gets sponsored)

-Soon after Jason realizes his lifelong dream of being sponsored and $1,000 being up for grabs if he wins a bodybuilding show, he decides that now is the perfect time to take a 2 week vacation from the gym, it's so sickening. This is a foreshadowing of what's to come in the Iron Mag Labs era.

-YouTube fitness celebrity Ian McCarthy makes a video professing that he enjoys Jason's videos and that people shouldn't put him down, because he's probably autistic. This infuriates Jason since he is not autism. He goes on an extended rant where he threatens to strangle Ian, calls him skinny, and says that he's a rich kid whose dad owns BP, the multi billion dollar oil company. In reality, his dad only works as an engineer or something for BP. How Jason equated that with owning the entire company is beyond me. (Jason goes in dry against Ian McCarthy)

-Jason posts on his Facebook that he needs an emergency liver transplant. A few moments later he famously posts: "Feel cold. I love all my fans. Remember me" The next day he claims that someone hacked into his Facebook account. Big Richard suggests that it must have been the Chinese military. (Jason addresses the liver failure rumour)

-Jason reunites with his old crew to film another My Story video, part 7 (not to be confused with the original My Story Part 7: Macho Man, which was deleted). Its release generates a huge amount of controversy because Jason does outrageous stunts in it like lighting his head on fire, riding on top of an SUV, and the producers are clearly making fun of him. Much to the displeasure of PJ Braun, it also includes a scene of Jason devouring an entire chicken in less than five minutes as two girls in the restaurant stare in disgust. (My Story Part 7)

-PJ Braun orders Jason never to hang around with the Jonas crew again, threatening to cut off his sponsorship if he does not comply. Jason tells his old producers to get lost and they have an ugly split, and they delete his original YouTube channel in revenge. Only a few of the My Story videos are able to be salvaged on other channels after this.

-Jason goes over to PJ's house to be lectured on his involvement with the Jonas crew and for a posing tutorial, resulting in the now legendary Jason posing at PJ's house video, which becomes one of the most popular Jason Genova videos of all time. Jason receives a pair of red posing trunks from PJ and cherishes them a little too much from that point on. The red posing trunks will make several guest appearances in later episodes. (Jason Genova heads to PJ Braun's house)

-Jason, as a "sponsored athlete" of Blackstone Labs (PJ and Aaron's new company), gets bags of pro hormones, pre workouts, etc. PJ buys hundreds of dollars worth of groceries for him so he will have no excuses for not eating correctly to make gains while cutting. Things are looking promising for Genova to finally get jacked; what can possibly go wrong? (PJ and Jason go grocery shopping)

-PJ writes up an idiot-proof diet plan. This proves impossible for Jason to follow and he admits to cheating on his diet. PJ and Aaron hit upon the genius idea of making a Jason-proof diet: it consists of as much eggs, beef, mustard, and water as Jason wants but only those things. This results in the infamous microwaved slab of frozen beef and microwaved egg videos, making it apparent that Jason has never cooked anything in his life, by extension meaning his diet is entirely fast food/microwave meals. Who knows what happened to all the fresh food PJ bought Jason, he obviously didn't know how to cook it. (The microwaved ground beef video)

-Iron Mag Labs drops Jason's sponsorship due to his lack of progress, but PJ and Aaron continue to sponsor him through their own supplement company, Blackstone Labs. The end of the video is one of the most emotional moments of the saga when Genova vows to keep fighting on while holding back tears as the Rocky theme plays softly in the background. (Jason dropped by Iron Mag Labs)

-A mysterious figure named Chad emerges. The first evidence of his existence is when "Jason" starts to write descriptions for his videos and replies to comments on his videos in a surprisingly literate manner. Chad is a marketing student who fancies himself as Jason's new manager and promises him lots of subscribers if he'll give him control of all his online accounts. He offers to give Jason a new HD camera so he can film his own videos when Andrew isn't around. Andrew warns Jason not to give his info out to strangers. Jason ignores him, Chad takes control, and starts changing video titles/keywords/various other things. Andrew is not happy that Jason ignored his warnings and put the YouTube channel in danger by freely giving out the password. The last straw is when Jason gave Chad Andrew's phone number and started making up stupid lies about him like Andrew demanding to be paid for filming a video, so Andrew quits as Jason's producer.

-After "cameragate", Andrew announces plans to start up his own YouTube show, tentatively titled "The Big Richard Show", after being encouraged by fans on The Misc to not stop filming after breaking up with Jason. He decides on the title "Delray Misfits" and episode 1 debuts, focusing on members of Delray Fitness other than Jason. (Delray Misfits episode 1)

-Jason's obsession with subscribers and increasingly erratic behavior causes a huge backlash from his fans. Blackstone Labs drops Jason's sponsorship after Jason, overwhelmed with hatred and trolls for his actions toward Andrew, threatens suicide on Facebook. (Jason Genova dropped by Blackstone Labs)

-Jason continues to pester PJ by demanding money and texting him twenty times a day. Eventually, PJ and Aaron hand Jason $500 as "severance pay" and cut all contact. Coathless and without a producer, Jason has officially hit rock bottom and makes a series of webcam videos bemoaning how mean the world is, how hard life is, and how much pressure he is under.

-Jason and Andrew reconcile, although Andrew still does not take the reins as his producer again, refusing to be drawn into Jason's sociopathic and using ways. He continues to film Delray Misfits episodes for his own channel, with Jason now appearing, and also helps film Jason for his channel but doesn't edit and upload the videos for him anymore. Delray Fitness comes under new ownership and is renamed World Gym. The new owners briefly try to ban filming in the gym, endangering The Ment, but Andrew negotiates an understanding between them. Jason Genova megathreads go into full swing on The Misc, explode with comments, fan made lols, and Genova quotes. Andrew also becomes active in the threads and answers questions about The Dark Lord. The Jason Genova saga is on its way to becoming a global phenomenon.

Adam Era (November 2013 - May 2014)

-Jason spins his wheels for a brief period before Adam, a boot camp trainer who met Jason at Publix, steps up to the plate. Adam also knew PJ Braun and had helped Jason do some extra cardio. Forum users and YouTube viewers initially loathe Adam and mock his CrossFit methods, his shirtlessness, bald head, and cocky demeanour. (Jason's first video with Adam)

-Adam is spending more and more time with the Sith Lord, but Adam gets visibly frustrated when there aren't any results. Adam is training with Jason one on one every day now. This is the most hands on dedicated coathing that Jason has received in his life, but he still makes torturously slow progress.

-Adam gets the idea to make a funny video where he surprise visits Jason at his condo and raids his fridge and cupboards for junk food. What ensues is a rather depressing video that gives previously unknown insight into Jason's home life. His condo is bought and paid for by his grandma, and he has no idea how to use the dishwasher or washing machine. He has bags and bags of supplements and pro hormones, which he got for free by showing up to supplement stores and refusing to leave until he got some free samples. He also has a sizable cache of unopened Blackstone Labs supplements left over from the PJ Braun Era, which may confirm PJ's suspicions that Jason never actually used the supplements that he was given; Jason's mom forbids him from using them anymore because they clash with his medication for his mental disabilities, and he had to go to the hospital twice for high blood pressure. At one point Jason asks his mom, "People think I'm retarded, I'm not retarded, I'm ADD OCD and dyslexic, right mom?" She looks at the floor, says, "Yes", then leaves the room. (The condo raiding video)

-Adam arranges for Jason to work out with Ronnie Coleman and Vitaly, a famous YouTube prankster. The owner of the gym is a Miscer (the gym is literally called BBC -- Boynton Barbell Center) and gets on the bad side of Witnesses when he almost forbids Jason from attending because he hates him. The gym is also quite shit, looks like a dentist's office with plain white walls, and doesn't even have any goddamn mirrors (the owner's reasoning is something along the lines of, "Hurr, this is a hardcore powerlifting gym, only fags need to look at themselves in the mirror, durr"). brb, drinking fountain right beside the shitter. Adam threatens to not do the workout with Ronnie at all in the gym if the owner doesn't let Jason come, so he eventually caves. During the video, Jason offends Adam by trying to impress Ronnie by telling him, "PJ Braun is my coach" right in front of Adam. (Ronnie Coleman and Vitaly video)

-Adam, who used to be a cop, brings back his old detective skills and goes into stalking mode because he doesn't understand why Jason hasn't shown much progress. He finds out that Jason has been getting coffee with cream and XXL Milky Way bars because he hilariously keeps incriminating evidence on his person in the form of stuffing his wallet full of receipts. Adam gets really mad and personally chews out Jason on camera. J-Cream says he's sorry and he won't do it anymore. (Coath Adam chews out Jason)

-Adam finds out Jason had some pizza slices. J-Crust denies it at first but admits it later. Rather than feel remorseful about cheating on his diet, he instead gets mad at his mom for ratting him out. Adam makes Jason do more and more burpees every day and stalks him at work to see what he brought for lunch. He makes Jason message him a picture of every meal. Jason gets out of doing burpees for a while because he is complaining about his hip.

-Jason's hours as a bagboy at Publix are revealed: he works under twenty hours a week. Adam talks to the manager in a bid to get Jason more hours or maybe even a promotion to stockboy or cashier. Jason claims to be good at math, and when Adam tests him on it, he surprisingly knows basic arithmetic. Jason is possibly at his leanest phase ever. His body fat is somewhere around 14-15% after weeks of hard work.

-Adam leaves on a holiday to Fiji for a week. He returns and made the unwise decision to trust Jason to pick him up from the airport. Jason switches his phone off and pretends to have forgotten. He then changes his story to having to work. Jason is noticeably fatter. His body fat comes in at 16%. He maintains that he has not cheated on his diet, even when confronted with the fact that he has gotten fatter in only a week.

-Trolls tell Adam that Genova went to Burger King. When Adam confronts Jason with these accusations, he has an epic temper tantrum and denies everything. He manages to clear his name when Adam takes him to the drive through window of Burger King and asks the employee there if she recognizes this man. She says that Jason used to be a regular there but she hasn't seen him in a long time. The Iron Serial Killer gives Adam a stone cold stare and utters, "I told you bro." (Temper tantrum and subsequent questioning of a Burger King employee)

-Adam and Bri take Jason out for his birthday to dinner and bowling. Adam hooks him up with some nice new clothes for the occasion. Clearly, Jason has suffered without a father figure in his life since his father's death, but
Genova seems to be on the verge of becoming a well-adjusted citizen with Adam's help. Jason hoverhands Bri in every photograph. (Birthday outing)

-Pudding Head gets trolled by somebody pretending to be Craig Titus, one of Jason's bodybuilding idols who is currently in prison for murder. Jason announces that he's going to do a video with Craig Titus, who will take him through a hardcore "prison rape dungeon workout." (Video)

-Jason comes over to Adam's house late at night unannounced. Adam says that Bri is in a bad mood because she entered a CrossFit competition and didn't do very well. Bri starts PMSing/roid raging at Adam. The Iron Serial Killer gives her an ice cold stare and utters, "Calm down Bri." (Surprise late night intrusion from Lord Pissious)

-Genova trains with a fan, Misc user Mingrey. Afterwards, his girlfriend asks Jason to show her his "lightsaber" (his dick) in a parking lot. Jason complies, remarking, "It's pretty big for a bodybuilder". Mingrey insists that he was only trying to create some ments, but lots of backlash ensues from Witnesses who say that he crossed the line. Jason doesn't seem to care about his dignity and is only concerned with the video blowing up in views. It's eventually deleted by YouTube censors. The next day, Genova claims in a phone call with a Witness that he banged the guy's girlfriend afterwards. (Video) (phone call)

-Genova tests his bodyfat and it comes in at 15.7%, increasing by about 1% from a week earlier. He threatens to starve himself like a teenage girl. Adam states that he is fed up and demands Jason come to boot camp every day. Adam puts him back on burpees and running, reasoning that if he can't force Jason to eat healthy then he will damn well run off all the carbs he is consuming. Jason's barely moving body fat levels indicate that it's a lot of carbs.

-Jason makes a video shopping with his mother. His mother complains about being on a budget, Jason whines incessantly, "I want the big one, mom. NAHHHT that one, the big one!" and otherwise is his complaining needy self. His mom, obviously torn between Jason wanting to keep up the pretense of eating healthy and her assertion that she is a nutritionist, struggles with Jason on what to buy. The result is hilarity as they argue over salads (which she argues that Jason never eats), and sugary cereal (which is obviously what Jason eats a lot of) is substituted for a slightly less sugary version. Jason takes the video down after the backlash, but it's quickly re-uploaded by someone else. (Shopping with Mother)

-Adam gives Genova an ultimatum that unless he gets down to 13%, he will not be allowed to work out with his hero Richard Gaspari, who once won the Arnold Classic and is now a supplement company kingpin. Jason has until the 22nd of March. He cuts out water, starts taking diuretics, and using the sauna on a daily basis in a last ditch effort to lose weight. The body fat test shows a result of 13.8%, his best ever, and he receives the name J-Sith.

-Genova admits that he has been cheating on his diet with granola bars. Granolaing. This causes more consternation and exasperation on Adam's part, as Jason seems to be trying his hardest to sabotage himself despite Adam putting in massive amounts of time with him.

-Genova tests his body fat and it puts him back at 14.5%. Jason becomes J-Crust again. He will not admit that he has cheated on his diet. Ironically, Jason's practice of dehydrating himself in order to lose weight may be backfiring on him since it is believed that dehydrating one's self will actually cause the electronic body fat tester to read the body fat as higher than usual. Adam stresses that if he is not 13% he will not be participating in the Gaspari video. Genova has possibly developed an eating disorder, starving himself and then gorging on junk.

-Jason's old producer Jonas re-emerges. Now that PJ Braun has cut ties with Jason he is no longer under any obligation to stay away from Jonas. Jason and Jonas make a video together and say that they are now friends again. They blame all the controversies with My Story Part 7 and Jason's old channel being deleted on Joe Skee, who has now been kicked out of the crew. The scapegoating of Joe Skee sounds suspicious, but Adam reluctantly allows Jonas to hang around with Jason but says that he'll be keeping his eye on him (sickening father figure Adam who's like 2 years older than Jason). Genova has been in the studio with Jonas recording "The Spaniard Shuffle", a poverty techno beat that Jason and Jonas are adamant will make them millions. (Jason and Jonas reunite)

-The AntiMent Bri almost backs over Jason with her truck while he's doing squats in an attempt to assassinate The Ment. Genova's Witnesses discover on the Misc thread that Jason receives a monthly shot of a powerful anti-psychosis drug called haloperidol. There have been studies linking the medication to permanent brain damage, which may explain why Jason seems to be less lucid than he was years ago. Adam states that Jason just got his shot, and he's extremely "out of it" for a few days. This leads to the infamous incident where Adam asks Jason to autograph a shaker cup being sent to a fan, and Jason writes "Janoy Cresva" on it. (The birth of Janoy Cresva)

-Janoy meets Richard Gaspari at the same BBC gym where they met Former Ronnie. Jason brings his mother along. She displays erratic behaviour, intimating it would not be a bad thing if Jason hanged himself so she wouldn't have to pay his phone bill. She asks Adam to see how hard her muscles are. She appears to hit on Richard Gaspari, later calling him a "nice looking little Italian boy." She is also wearing bizarre attire and, in short, comes across as a female alcoholic version of Jason. Jason gets shown how to do exercises for shoulders and delts correctly, promptly reverts to usual form. (Richard Gaspari workout video)

-The BBC gym owner's younger brother Brendan is like an even more douchey version of Bostin Loyd (if that's even possible); he has the same gay sounding lisp, dim-wittedness, and douche face. He freaks out over a small drop of pre-workout drink that Jason spilled on the floor and makes him clean it up. So much for it being a hardcore powerlifting gym. This draws the ire of Witnesses. It's also discovered that Brendan lied about being co-owner of the gym, and in reality, his brother just lets him hang around there to keep his idiot little brother out of trouble. Brendan gets relentlessly trolled by Witnesses and eventually has to make an apology video with Jason where Brendan gets down on all fours and cleans up some water himself. (Brendan's apology)

-Genova manages to release a video with crumbs on his mouth and cream smeared on his face. You can't make this up. He insists that it was a protein shake. His story and the evidence are at odds. He maintains that it was a protein shake even in the face of relentless interrogation by Adam. Twitches, hands clawening, high voice, and wild eyes prove that Jason is lying. Jason is back to J-Cream. (The infamous cream-on-mouth video)

-Andrew takes Genova to the gun range, where he shoots a picture of the hated body fat tester and a picture of Gideon. At one point, Genova carelessly points a loaded gun at Andrew, almost killing him. (Jason and Andrew head to the shooting range)

-Adam helps Genova open his first bank account at age 29. All his money went to his mother, who presumably withheld it and spent it on booze judging by her actions. She eventually finds out about Jason's bank account and confiscates all his money.

-Genova weighs in at a lean 181 pounds and visible abs start to show for the first time in his life. Adam leaves for another vacation -- a cruise. During the whole Adam Era, Jason tends to be depressed and lethargic from all the dieting, but while Adam is away, he is unusually jolly and energetic, suggesting that he is pigging out to his heart's content.

-Genova picks up Adam and Bri from the airport. During the drive home, Genova claims to have sold the rights to one of his videos to Nickelodeon (????????). Jason's body fat is up again and it's obvious that he hasn't trained at all while Adam was away, and rather than admit that he cheated on his diet, Jason claims that it was from "shooting testosterone." How taking steroids would result in fat gain is beyond me. Miraculously, Adam buys the story, and he forces Jason to go on camera and admit that he took steroids. This possibly makes Jason Genova the first ever reverse fake natty, who pretends to be on steroids but actually isn't. (Jason's dubious steroid confession)

-A big shitstorm arises at the Jason Genova megathread on The Misc: a moderator named pUniCepts gets mad about all the Genova threads, doesn't understand the Jason Genova saga, locks the threads, and calls out Genova's Witnesses for "making fun of a retard." his attempt to white knight Genova hilariously backfires when The Spaniard himself makes a video calling the "narrator" "Poonycheeps" a faggot. In a rage, Poonycheeps bans all Genova talk on the board. This decision is soon reversed by higher-ups after a significant backlash, and the threads are re-opened. Poonycheeps is extremely butthurt and plots his revenge. (Dark Lord Spaniard goes in dry on Poonycheeps)

-Andrew and Genova head to the mall in an attempt to recreate some of the magic from a legendary mall video that they had done years prior, this time with a toy lightsaber in Jason's belt. The video fails to live up to expectations, but after a lady tries to get Jason to sign up to a college, Jason reveals that he never graduated high school and failed to get his General Equivalency Diploma when he tried. Strangely enough, though, a picture of Jason graduating high school is later discovered on his Instagram, so he apparently lied about not having his diploma in order to have an excuse not to attend college. We can now add "high school dropout" to his list of lies, in addition to "steroid injector" and "gay porn star". (Jason Genova heads to the mall again)

-Genova skips morning boot camp. He claims laryngitis. 6 hours later he is over it. You really can't make this stuff up. Adam is getting frustrated because Genova is making no progress. He weighs in at 187 pounds. He got fat again.

-Genova starts boxing lessons with JT. He quickly dumps Apollo Cream after he starts begging for money and posting emotional Facebook statuses. He also seems rather disturbed by Jason claiming he did "Pay for gay" in the past. JT says, "I can't be having that." (Apollo Cream gets boxing training from JT)

-Adam and Tucker go to pick up Genova to go out to the nightclub Renegades. When Adam arrives at Genova's place and calls for him, he doesn't respond. Adam lets himself in and briefly catches Jason standing around in his house completely naked. (Video)

-Ian McCarthy, who is no longer under Genova's wrath, visits Delray Beach and trains with Jason. He and his girlfriend stay in Genova's condo for a few days and make a few sickening videos. Jason admits to taking pre-workouts before and after workouts, at night, basically drinking them all the time, even eating the powder straight. This helps explain why Jason can be regularly seen posting Star Wars videos on his Facebook until 4:30 AM and then shows up to the gym at 5:30 AM for a video. We don't care about sleep, we're freaks! (Ian McCarthy catches Jason eating pre-workout powder)

-Adam quits, citing his wife's displeasure with him spending all his time with Jason, a new business venture, and Jason's woeful motivation levels (Jason protests and insists that he's "pushing himself to the ultimate limit of physics"). This marks the official end of the Adam Era. He has so far been the most successful out of all of Jason's coaths, getting the Sith Lord down to about 180 pounds and 13/14% body fat in his prime. (Adam's last video) | (Gif of Jason in his best ever shape)

Hindenburg Era (May 2014 - October 2014) 

The Hindenburg devouring chocolate covered strawberries, stem and all, during the infamous Golden Corral buffet video


-Ian McCarthy is now Genova's new coath. Sickened by his visit and basking in The Ment, Ian actually wants to coath Genova and believes he can succeed where no one else has and get Genova in shape. "Ian MacThey" says that he will live with Jason for 3 months during the summer.

-JG is getting fatter by the day without Adam breathing down his neck. According to Jason's Instagram and Facebook, he claims to be back on steroids or "skillets," but whether The Iron Reverse Fake Natty is telling the truth or not is anyone's guess. "I've gained ten pounds of solid muscle in a week bro."

-Misc narrator Poonycheeps locks the Genova thread in a surprise revenge attack and starts his own thread about JG. When people refuse to post in his thread, he deletes seven 250+ post threads worth of Genova content and bans the creation of any more. He tries to bait Genova's Witnesses into flaming him so he has an excuse to ban them, then lies about receiving harassing e-mails and phone calls from Witnesses, saying that he conveniently deleted all the evidence because he was so traumatized. Witnesses are forced to temporarily flee to FitMisc, which is notorious for being a cesspool made up entirely of people who have been banned from The Misc (which is already bad enough). Poonycheeps is eventually defeated yet again and the thread is opened back up.

-Ian reneges on his plan to live with and train The Iron Serial Killer, presumably after seeing the deterioration of Janoy without the guiding hand of Adam to keep him somewhat in shape, and reasoning (rightly) that Janoy truly is a lost cause.

-Jason announces that he's taking a break from YouTube for a week because he's under a lot of stress. Who can blame him with those grueling 20 hour work weeks. No one believes that The Iron Attention Whore can do it. One day later, he makes a video letting everyone know that his break from making videos is going really well. Seriously can't even make this shit up. It quickly becomes apparent to fans that when Jason said that he's taking a week long break from videos, what he actually meant was that he's taking a week long break from lifting weights. (Jason updates his fans on his "break")

-Jason, after soliciting up to $200 online from shoutout donations to "fund his bodybuilding career," spends $158.99 on a necklace for some bipolar whore from New York named Erica. Mike Bisceglia a.k.a. TheRage191 hears about this and succeeds in getting said necklace from said whore, but not before Jason makes a video calling TheRage a hater and declaring his undying love for Erica. Jason avoids all mentions of this when quizzed on camera by Andrew, fidgeting and avoiding eye contact. (TheRage191 steals Jason's girl)

-Jason is confirmed not to be training; he has had approximately four workout sessions in a month and a half since Adam dropped him. The muscle loss and fat gain is evident, though Jason maintains all the fat is muscle. Jason refuses to train unless someone is filming him and looks like complete shit. He balloons back up to 21% body fat, his content deteriorates to unwatchable levels, and the future looks bleak for a coathless Janoy in zombie mode. Jason actually runs away from the camera for the first time in his life after the 21% body fat diagnosis.

-Jason's old producer Jonas gets a lot of accusations that he wants to use Jason's fame to take all the profits from the track "The Spaniard Shuffle." To prove that he's not exploiting Jason, he sets up a fake record deal/contract signing where he has Jason sign a number of documents in the presence of a "lawyer" named Scott Miller who is unshaven, clearly high, and is struggling to read a script written on an off camera cue card. It looks suspiciously like Jonas just found a homeless guy and dressed him up in a suit. The whole farce is unintentionally hilarious and is the first watchable thing that Jason has put out since being dropped by Adam. (The infamous contract signing video with Attorney Scott Miller)

-Jason affirms to Andrew that he is learning to be an air conditioning technician, going to wrestling school, going to compete in a "powerlifting show," getting a supplement deal with Liquid Gold Nutrition (pissening), and flying to Ohio to sign the contract. How much, if any, of this is ever going to happen is questionable.

-Jason's stepsisters begin to emerge in the YouTube comments section of Jason's videos and later join the Jason Genova thread on The Misc. They reveal some interesting info: Jason's real father Gary P. Genova is still alive and living in California, and they contend that Jason's mother is an insane alcoholic (not really a surprise to anyone who has followed the saga) who neglects Jason. Jason's family is revealed to be very wealthy, and Rosov is his mother's maiden name. His mom is living off a trust fund, thus making Jason's menial bagboy job at Publix even more pointless. Pictures of Jason's uncle surface, family resemblance is uncanny. He was a professional chef in Beverly Hills, which in light of the family wealth coming from restaurants vs Jason's patent inability to create a basic meal is hilarious. Jason is not a Frantzen other than his mother marrying a Frantzen and then remarrying and divorcing another man subsequently. The stepsisters resent them using the Frantzen name since the Rosov/Genova clan are obviously all potato.

-An obscure cooking video is discovered on YouTube made by Jason's uncle, a professional chef. Witnesses promptly swamp the comments section and ask him if he'll do some microwave ground beef and scambald eggs next. (Cooking with Uncle Janoy)

-Jonas begins hyping up a new installment in the My Story franchise, part 8. After pushed back release dates and nearly a month of promotion from Dark Lord Pissious and the Rat Prick Jonas, it's finally released to universal derision. It's like a half-assed copy of My Story Part 7 and mostly features The Pillsbury Doughboy waddling around the streets of Delray Beach and posing awkwardly as the Rat King asks random strangers if they know who Janoy Cresva is. The only slightly redeeming feature is the brief Attorney Scott Miller cameos and a phone call where Jason finds out that his mom stole all the money in his bank account. (My Story Part 8)

-Adam Pollard appears on the scene. Jason has the sense to only bring it up off camera as Pollard slowly gains his trust and convinces Jason that his yet to be launched supplement company, "Pollard Nutrition," wants him as a figurehead for products such as "Liquid Gold". Pollard releases numerous videos talking about his supplement company. Witnesses are not sure what to make of it; 99% of their brains acknowledge that it's probably a troll, yet Pollard's masterful delivery creates that 1% of doubt and intrigue. After numerous contract wangles, where Jason hasn't yet signed Pollard's contract, cracks begin to show and Jason (with help from someone) becomes aware that all is not as it seems with Pollard Nutrition. Pollard releases desperate videos asking why Jason hasn't signed yet as his troll job falls apart.

-Pollard essentially admits that it was all a troll job with a ridiculous video culminating in a CGI bullet smashing the lens. No word from Jason on what he thought of the whole Pollard Nutrition farce. (Pollard Nutrition bullet video)

-The Monkey Prick meme comes to fruition after Facebook poster Alex Johnson leaves a picture comment of what looks like a half man/half monkey with a striking similarity to Jason on all of Jason's Facebook statuses and unwatchable poverty Star Wars videos. Alex captions the photo comment with, "Monkey Prick" and it just starts to spread like wildfire. Jason is asked by Andrew on camera what he thinks about the nickname "Monkey Prick" and Jason is clearly aggravated by it, which eggs on even more people to call him Monkey Prick.

-Joe Skee, who supposedly was just released from Rikers Island prison for selling meth to young children, rejoins the Jonas crew and interviews Jason and some creature named Deeana who can only be described as, "The offspring of two fat people." Joe Skee continues to question whether Jason has showed the foul beast his lightsaber and whether or not he wants to engage in intercourse, to which Jason successfully avoids giving a true answer. (Deeana The Hutt)

-Deeana is staying with Genova and he acts coy, but it is plain to see that Jason has hooked up with a female version of himself with no more brain cells but a lot more cunning. As a degenerate moocher herself, Jason's mother recognizes Deeana for what she is and kicks her out, banning her from staying at Jason's condo. Jason continues to sneak her in at night. We never learn if he got a bang bro, or if the two of them just pigged out while watching Star Wars a million times in a row. She eventually disappears.

-Jason comes dangerously close to going full retard, releasing a bizarre video where he shows up to the gym wearing a woman's tank top and his shorts hiked up to his stomach. He giggles incessantly about his body odour and constantly spouts nonsensical lines like, "Sticky bandits, like Elmer's glue, huehuehuehue!" Andrew remarks, "Oh my God, what's wrong with you today? You're like drooling and shit!" The haloperidol may have finally taken its toll on Janoy Cresva's brain. (Janoy's manic workout video)

-Jason announces that he is now on a mission to bulk to 260 pounds. Heart attackening. The Hindenburg Era is officially about to go into full swing.

-Balloon Prick goes to the "boofay" at Golden Corral with Andrew and attempts to put the place out of business. He proceeds to call himself a garbage disposal unit after eating all of the slop. Andrew calls him the human dishwasher. The Piss Lord marks his territory on the pizza by coughing on it. Truly sickening. He eats five or six helpings of slop (as he calls it continuously in front of everyone -- chefs, waitresses, fellow diners) in his quest to rival The Hindenburg as the biggest balloon. He eats chocolate covered strawberries, stem and all, while doing a bizarre wheezing laugh that sounds like a literal pig. All of Coath Adam's hard work has officially swirled down the toilet. The Hindenburg consumes approximately 300,000,000,000,000 calories total for his dirty bulk. He also lets random patrons at the boofay know that he's a YouTube bodybuilder celebrity with 90 million views. (The legendary Golden Corral buffet video)

-Balloon Prick's body weight soars to 230 pounds. Leanest he's ever been, bro. The Hindenburg tells us that he will dirty bulk until January. He predicts that his weight by then will be 300 pounds ripped (he uses the weights of IFBB pro Mr. Olympia bodybuilders as a reference). Janoy Giovanni will then "cut" before his upcoming show. Estimated year of bodybuilding show: 3523.

-Someone enters Genova into an online "Physique Of The Week" contest, and despite having the worst physique by far, he wins the contest by a thousand votes, much to the annoyance of the people who actually dieted and worked hard on their physiques. Screenshot of the voting results here. Jason shows up to the gym in a joyous mood, delighted to be on the receiving end of "politics" for once after being screwed over in all of his previous bodybuilding shows, just like Mike Mentzer in 1980 Mr. Olympia. He claims that Physique Of The Week is giving him a supplement sponsorship, a weekly cash amount, $100 of free supplements, and an interview. He proceeds to brag about this and his upcoming t-shirt/jumper line to a random woman on the cable machine.

-However, Physique Of The Week's owner Rick Hall decides not to give the contest win to Jason and instead gives it to second place, despite the clear rules that wins are decided by votes alone, sparking a massive outcry from Jason's sizeable fanbase. The Sith Lord issues Order 66 against POTW and Rick Hall. POTW quickly disables the ability to make comments on their Facebook page and deletes any post mentioning the Piss Lord's win. Pisstroopers begin to message the site's sponsors with their opinions on this outrage. Rick Hall begins a massive cover up.

-Facebook deletes Physique Of The Week's page after pisstroopers report it for being a scam. POTW locks their twitter. Not only do Optimum Nutrition and Monster Supplements confirm that their sponsorship is dropped, but we find out that they had actually stopped sponsoring the contest long ago, so it's illegal for their logos to still be used on the POTW site and for them to be making representations that they're still sponsored by Optimum/Monster. It's also discovered that Rick Hall is a scumbag whose videos are full of fake likes/comments that he bought, and he's also a roided up fake natty who used to private message people on message boards offering to sell them roids. Rick Hall pisses himself and, in a last ditch effort to save face, he puts out a press release claiming that the Shitlord bought Facebook votes to win the contest. This claim is totally laughable (especially in light of Jason's notorious Jewishness) and Rick Hall continues to be relentlessly trolled. A gallery of screengrabs related to the scandal.

-Jason releases a video claiming that Rick Hall contacted him personally and apologized, offering him the interview and prize. It is legitimately the most heartfelt video that Jason has ever put out, acknowledging Witnesses as his "pals" and "buddies" and being delighted that all of his "hard work" has finally been recognized. The interview never ends up happening, but Physique Of The Week's contest and website are nevertheless completely destroyed and defunct from that point on. (The Sith Lord celebrates victory)

-Poonycheeps sees the shitstorm resulting from the Physique Of The Week scandal as an opportunity to accuse Genova's Witnesses of organizing a raid, which is against the rules of The Misc, despite the fact that they were righting a legitimate injustice. The last straw may have been a prominent Witness named Alfha printing out a picture of Jason's stepsister Shelley Frantzen and jizzing all over it. Genova's Witnesses are permanently banned from The Misc and exiled to FitMisc for good.

-We learn from Andrew on the newest Delray Misfits episode that the Hindenburg sent a picture to notorious catfisher Robert Lucarelli showing that Jason likes his smelly angus peppered by going knuckle deep. This spawns his latest nickname KD or Knuckle Deep, and a new Genovaverse term, "Knuckle deepening." (Andrew demands an explanation for the knuckle deep photo)

-Jason brings the Hindenburg Era to a premature end, his dirty bulk sputtering out as he is unable to break the 230 pound plateau, because after that point he actually has to work to gain weight. The entertainment value of his videos has plummeted to dire levels. Witnesses worry that The Ment may finally be dead, but they won't believe what comes next ...

I'm Not Hindenburg Anymore Bro Era (October 2014 - September 2015)

-Jason resolves to end the Hindenburg phase. After a chance encounter in the gym, he gets a new coath, Debbie D'Andrea (go to if you dare): a dominatrix/bodybuilder/powerlifter/porn star who is built like The Rock and sounds like she smokes 40 a day. She is Big Richard in female form. She teaches Jason correct form, actually following a proper routine, and doing abs. Jason is actually willing to listen to her because she's comically bigger than him and outlifts him. (The arrival of Coath Debbie)

-While doing a workout video with new coath Debbie, Jason unleashes the dungeon slayer in him on his mom, who got a job at World Gym as a personal trainer somehow. She confronts her almost 30 year old son about him rudely leaving Debbie out to dry for five minutes while he went to fetch his camera, at which point the Sith Lord grabs his mom and yells, "STOP IT, STOP IT!" Parental abusening, scambaldening, STOP IT STOP ITening. His mom merely looks her lizard eyes at the camera as if his behaviour is completely expected, Norma Batesening. (The STOP IT, STOP IT incident)

-Jason reunites with former coath Adam for one video, and he is less than amused at Jason's rapid Hindenburgening weight gain and how all of his hard work went down the shitter. Adam inspects his wallet for old times' sake and finds it full of receipts from various boofays that Jason has engorged in. (The Jason and Adam reunion)

-Jason gets some good workouts in with Coath Debbie. He's scared to disobey her, and he greatly respects her opinions on bodybuilding. They both agree that Arnold's physique was "feminine" compared to Dorian Yates. Jason repays Debbie for her time and services by urging his fans to visit her porn site at the end of videos. Things are looking very promising for this mutually beneficial arrangement, but unfortunately, the Coath Debbie era abruptly ends. Deb was tired of all the unwanted attention and trolling, and she asks Andrew to delete all of the videos that she was in. Coath Killer Genova strikes again. Everything he touches turns to piss.

-Tim Terwilliger, an amateur bodybuilder and longtime Genova's Witness, moves to Florida to take up a job with Blackstone Labs and agrees to train Jason on the side. Jason, despite coming from a loaded family, paying no bills, and basically having an allowance from his mother as pocket money to do with as he wishes, is "broke" constantly and has the shamelessness and Jewishness to ask Tim for gas money on countless occasions. This despite Tim being newly married and legit broke. (Jason begs for gas money)

-Tim fills in for Coath Deb and trains Jason to the best of his ability, but without Adam's level of commitment, it soon fizzles out and surprise surprise Tim's job falls through and he ends up living in his car before moving back in with his parents in Connecticut with his wife, leaving Jason alone. The Coath Tim era is over almost before it began. He still contacts Jason and coaths him over the phone. He sends him a bunch of supplements, but with Jason being a reprehensible liar with no work ethic, this is merely a nicety on Tim's part, and he is soon dumped. Once again, Jason has killed another coath, and his coath's life has turned to piss.

-Jason's appearances and video output declines. His diet is obviously non existent, yet because in his head he has "stopped bulking" (though he probably only eats slightly less of his usual fill of shite), he maintains that he is "getting lean bro" in every camera appearance despite his physique barely changing and him being fat as fuck. Jason uploads rarely and has all but forgotten what "Coath Dib" and Coath Tim had shown him. Work ethic is back to zero, shit workouts, hammer curls + bicep curls, endless chest days with 3 sets of 5 reps bench press before leaving the gym and "intermittent cardio" where he jogs gently for five minutes and then sits down and repeats for an hour. Beats per minute not even once.

-As a result of the shit-tier quality of ments Jason is providing, the trolling steps up to a whole new level from members of the notorious Monkey Prick Facebook group, who are known as "Monkey Prickers". They specialize in trolling/harassing Jason and other Genovaverse characters (they were the prime suspects in causing Coath Debbie to quit). Jason is enticed to cook a romantic dinner for an imaginary girl: tilapia with sickening paper towel napkins. They also bait him into driving for an hour to pick up an imaginary girl, which Jason falls for multiple times.

-Pudding Head gives a shoutout to "Anal KD Supplements" and actually makes a few videos shouting out "Anal KD Supplements" or "KD anal gel". Here's the transcript from one video: "Kris, uh, Samsamson or Simpson from uh, Newz-- Australia New Zealand's getting a shoutout and it's Ane, KD Anal gel, the best gel on the market. K, k, uh, KD Anal gel is the best uh supplement on the market. Wiz, is k-anal Anal gel dot com. K k k KD uh rectal abdominal anal gel dot com. A sickening shoutout. K-anal." (The knuckle deepening endorsement)

-Jason's online coath Ian McCarthy arrives in Delray Beach to provide some much needed ments. His visit was much hyped, as plans were underway for a visit to the zoo to have Jason interact with his biological parents. The visit turns out to be a disappointment, but we do get a fascinating video where they go out to a restaurant with Jason, and it's discovered that he has an extraordinary memory: he is able to recall the date and even the exact time when the Titanic hit an iceberg, the exact time it sank, among other historical facts that Ian quizzes him on. Rain Mannening. (Ian and Jason's meal conversation)

-Jason laughs for several minutes at the death of famous fitness guru Greg Plitt (well he DID try to outrun a train) and manages to get some of the other Delray Misfits to engage in his scumbaggish behavior, most notably Battletoad/giant rat hybrid Fat Fucking Lenny, who goes off on a rant about visiting gay bars, scat, etc. This joking/mocking of Greg Plitt's bizarre, and honestly, potato mode of death creates a lot of controversy and hate from Greg Plitt fans, which could be deemed overly sensitive or hypocritical considering this is standard Genova behaviour when confronted with death, real life, anything outside of his fantasy world. Andrew later issues an apology on behalf of the Iron Icicle (feel cold member me fans) on his YouTube page for his remarks about Greg Plitt, though we have yet to hear an actual apology from Jason himself. (The Delray Misfits react to Greg Plitt getting hit by a train)

-New questions about Jason's sexual preferences arise with the dawning of 2015. Does our Sith Lord enjoy the dark side of the force a little too much? Does his constant threat of, "All shove a red lightsaber up your candy ass," have a Freudian subtext? With the banning of Genova talk on's Misc forum, and the subsequent scattering of Genova's Witnesses across various message boards spreading the gospel of Genova far and wide, the Muscular Development forum's resident ex-Genovaverse character Ron Harris has been dragged right back into the middle of the Genova saga: A FitMiscer claims he remembers reading on MD about Jason licking peanut butter off of Ron's chest when they did their collaboration back in the My Story Era. When questioned, the happily married, devoutly Christian father of two Ron Harris immediately denies these accusations for obvious reasons. Another FitMiscer says, "I thought it was supposed to be a joke but when I asked Jason on facebook he said it happened but he doesn't do it anymore." We are left with so many questions: why did Ron do it? Why is Ron so obsessed with Jason's penis? Is Jason "Mr. No Homo" Genova a homo? We may never know the answers to these questions, but we do know one thing for sure: It piss.

-To further add to the no homo/full homo debate surrounding Jason Giovanni, Monkey Prick group members have at various points over the past few months exchanged texts via Facebook with Jason of a homosexual nature, with him asking for posing pictures, admitting to liking men (it only fun huehuehue), and then telling the Monkey Pricker not to tell anyone. Screenshots emerge of Jason asking for pictures of other guys' dicks. He responds to one dick picture with, "nices ! it big mabye it hurt bit... but i sith lord can take !" In another conversation he says, "gey it better, no stress, just fun." When confronted with these statements, Mr. No Homo explains, "My mind clouded like Anakin!" (Screenshots)

-Andrew promises Jason a surprise at the gym, and his idol/crush PJ Braun walks in. It is the first time that he has acknowledged Jason's existence since the break up over a year ago. They film a reunion workout video together that once again has Jason gushing about "PeeJay" and the Iron Parrot returns to repeat every second word out of PJ's mouth. PJ says that he and Aaron Singerman have traveled all across the world, and it doesn't matter what country they're in: be it Australia, Spain, or Germany -- somebody always comes up to them and asks them, "Where's Jason?" Jason also makes a guest appearance on Aaron Singerman's channel a few months later in a video with one of their sponsored bodybuilders Aaron Clark, who is training to compete in the Arnold Classic. Jason proceeds to give a homo erotic commentary of Aaron Clark's posing routine, uttering things like, "God, you look great" after he slips his shirt off for the first time. (Aaron Clark poses for Jason)

-Jason Likes the "Gay Bodybuilders" and "Gay Community" pages on his Facebook. Jason has officially crossed over to the dark side, huehuehuehuehue (Screenshot) 

-Jason announces plans to compete in the Ruby Championships bodybuilding show with Big Lenny. Fears that he will drop out, like usual, are possibly abated by Big Lenny's promise that he will pick up Jason and throw his ass on stage if he has to. If he ends up going through with it, it will be the first bodybuilding show that Jason has competed in since the Abz of Adoniss show three years ago.

-Jason gets a new camera, signalling the end of the infamous Chad Betrayal Cam. Unfortunately, the new camera does not have the feature of self-editing videos, and since Jason is too lazy to learn how to edit videos (even though Andrew offered to teach him several times), all of his vids are now 20 minute long single-shots with no cuts, we Children of Men now.

-A creepy, skinny, bearded hipster shows up in Delray Beach and says he's filming a Jason Genova documentary. He only gets two days worth of footage and then disappears. The jury is out on this documentary ever seeing the light of day. Jason is delusional and thinks that the documentary will make a million dollars. "Dreams come true bro." (The supposed documentary maker arrives)

-Lee Priest calls Jason "The godfather of retards" in a video, re-igniting the Jason Genova/Lee Priest feud from the early My Story Era. Jason pretends to be mad, but he's clearly relishing in the attention and tries to milk the feud for all it's worth. He mocks Lee for never winning a "Mr. Arnold Classic" competition. The 5 foot 6.5 inch Jason Genova also enjoys being able to lord his height over someone else for once, calling Lee a "manlet" and a "dorf." (Lee Priest insults Genova)

-The leftover Hindenburg fat proves difficult to shed, so Jason invents the "Ethiopian Crackhead Diet" to lean down for his show, which consists of only protein shakes, almonds, and Quest Bars. He eventually gets a new "supplement coath" named Wesley who looks like a total goober and could honestly pass for Jason's brother, but he actually won a national teen bodybuilding show ten years ago. Andrew and Brad agree to pay Jason $100 each if he actually gets his body fat below 10% for the show. If he fails, he promises to take them out to a fancy steakhouse that costs $100 for a steak. We can be certain that Andrew and Brad don't need to worry about Jason getting below 10% body fat, and it is equally certain that Jason won't come through on his promise to take them out to the steakhouse.

-The Iron Chef a.k.a. "Chef Crackhead" releases another video showing off his cooking skills, so you know it's gonna be good. After struggling to turn on the stove, he finally drops a frozen fish straight from the freezer into the pan. After it's done, he puts it on a dirty plate that had been sitting in the sink for God knows how long after wiping it with a filthy sponge. He notices that the sink is clogged with mold and attempts to unclog it by reaching his hand into the drain and pulling out all the disgusting muck. He then proceeds to eat his meal without even bothering to wash his hand. Afterwards, to show everyone what a sophisticated gentleman he is, he pours himself some Pinot Grigio wine and drinks it out of a dirty ass blender cup with a bunch of shit floating around in it. (Cooking with Chef Crackhead)

-The 30 year old Jason Genova announces that he has officially fallen to the dark side and demands to be referred to as "Lord Vader" from now on, not Jason Genova. One Witness says in the comments section: "Gotcha. Monkey Prick it is." (Jason Genova becomes Lord Vader)

-Darth Tater is recorded having a drink with a fan. The fan asks Jason who his all time favourite coath was, and he answers PJ Braun. He says that he didn't like Adam, the coath who got him into better shape than he had ever been in his whole life. Well that's unfortunate; this shocking display of ingratitude has probably burned the bridge for a potential reunion with Coath Adam. On the bright side, PJ must be flattered that Jason thinks so highly of him. Maybe he'll think about working with Jason agai-- "I don't like his wife though. His wife doesn't like me. She's a cunt." Oh dear. (Jason opines on former coaths)

-Miraculously, a couple weeks before the Ruby Championships, Genova actually manages to diet down to 180 pounds by following a salmon and green beans diet suggested by Big Jay Masters. Jason's weight is now roughly the same as it was during his Adam Era peak, but his physique does not look exactly the same. His abs aren't as lean as they were back then, but he does look bigger. The bet that Andrew, Brad, and Jason made regarding Jason's body fat ends up being called off after the calipers test him at 8% body fat, which is obviously inaccurate. The consensus is that his true body fat is somewhere between 12% - 14%, but the only way to know for sure would be to pay for an expensive underwater body fat test. It's actually rather surprising that Jason accepts the inaccuracy of the calipers without a fight, rather than throwing a tantrum about rightfully winning the $200 for being below 10%. (Jason gets his body fat tested)

-Marc Lobliner of Tiger Fitness gets pestered by Genova's Witnesses, who tell him to collab with The Sith Lord. Lobliner goes on a Poonycheeps-like rant rebuking all of Jason's fans for "picking on a disabled man" and says that he has better things to do than spend time collaborating with Jason. Lord Vader issues Order 66 against "Marc Lowrider." All of his videos are promptly swamped with troll comments by Witnesses, and the like to dislike ratio of his videos plummets to 1:10. This couldn't come at a worse time for Marc because the Mr. Olympia is going on, and he's in the process of posting videos plugging his supplements. Terrified of the power of the dark side, Marc surrenders and apologizes to Jason and his fans, saying that he is willing to collab with Jason in the future. He also sends him a package of free supplements to appease him. Lord Vader calls for additional Order 66s against other targets: Rich Piana (for not giving him a 5%er sponsorship) and Vince G. Rich Piano's channel proves difficult for the Sith army to penetrate since it is already completely infested with trolls, and invading it is like pissing into an ocean of piss. (Marc Lobliner admits defeat to Lord Vader and the pisstroopers)

-Hype for the impending Ruby Championships reaches a fever pitch. Andrew says that many of the Misfits will be at the show as well as PJ Braun, Adam Harper, and more. Andrew says that he will film as much of the show as he can and promises that it will be the greatest bodybuilding related video of all time. In the days leading into the contest, even Lord Vader's crappy late night webcam videos where he poses and redundantly repeats himself for 3 minutes get a lot of likes and few dislikes; the Order 66 victories over various fitness industry figures has really brought the Genova's Witnesses together. Genova's popularity skyrockets as more and more people become curious about the buzz surrounding the Ruby Championships and wonder who was responsible for bringing these major YouTube channels to their knees. The Ment may be entering a new golden age. Genova is receiving training from a World Gym employee named "Coath Andrew" (not to be confused with Andrew the camera man). After the Ruby Championships, everyone will know the Sith Lord's name.

-Lord Vader's show at the Ruby Championships goes down. The Iron Penny Pincher didn't want to buy a proper spray tan, so he instead got Nate to spray him with cooking oil that he got from Costco (???????). Genova rushes through his entire posing routine in about 15 seconds without holding his poses, so he awkwardly keeps repeating them all while his Star Wars music finishes playing out (double the poses = double the points!). He wins third place ... out of three competitors. Hilariously enough, by simply getting a top 3 finish, he receives a trophy and apparently has qualified for Nationals, once again proving the legendary Jason Genova adage that "sometimes nobody shows up and you automatically win." Jason disrespects all of Coath Andrew's hard work in training him by having the MC announce that he was trained by PJ Braun, who didn't even come to the show. Jason is sad that neither PJ nor Adam came to the show to support him. But not to worry: A large contingent of Genova's Witnesses bought tickets to the show to cheer him on. They are waiting for him in the lobby after the competition is over, and they hoist him up and chant, "Jason! Jason! Jason!" (Jason Genova at the Ruby Championships)

The Year of the Monkey Prick (September 2015 - July 2016)

-In Jason's post contest interview, he declares himself to be more powerful than The Pope and the next Zyzz. He says that he's doing another show in November, but it's going to cost him a few hundred dollars. He says, "Someone's gonna have to cough up that money." We can assume that Jason Jewnova is referring to somebody other than himself. Although the spotlight was shined on Jason during the Ruby Championships, he wastes the opportunity by releasing a bunch of pointless videos in the weeks afterwards. He executes a series of Order 66s against large fitness channels for no reason other than drawing more attention to himself: Lui Marco, Vegan Gains, Elliot Hulse, Christian Guzman, Nick Wright, and Kali Muscle, among others. Although the pisstroopers were happy to carry out Order 66s in the past with vigour, they quickly grow weary of them. Messing with Kali Muscle in particular proves to be a mistake, because he retaliates by putting a voodoo curse on Jason. This proves to be effective: Dissent in the ranks abounds, and Jason's videos go back to the way they were before the Ruby Championships hype: more dislikes than likes. (Kali Muscle's voodoo curse)

-Jason's run of awful videos continues for a good month. He makes a series of redundant webcam videos where he repeatedly stresses that "there's no money in bodybuilding." Jason gets yet another new coath, a guy who runs a gym called "The Wolves Den" and he owns actual wolves as pets. Jason "preps" for his next show, which involves getting fatter than he was at the Ruby, apparently, yet he sees it as him getting freaky, like Craig Titus. Jason Genova posing in his underwear in the middle of the weight room is such a common sight in World Gym that people don't even bat an eye anymore. Jason also makes a video congratulating himself for reaching 20,000 subscribers. (I did good, fans)

-Lord Vader reviews a movie that isn't even out yet: the new Star Wars movie, The Force Awakens. He gives a spoiler warning AFTER he drops a spoiler. He declares that this yet-to-be-released movie is better than the prequel trilogy: Episodes I, II, and III, but isn't as good as the original trilogy: Episodes IV, V, and VI. He says that the original trilogy was the best, especially The Empire Strikes Back, and that "Phantom of the Menace" and the rest of the prequel trilogy was horribly done. Jason is obviously just parroting the popular critical opinion of the Star Wars movies; in reality, he NEVER talks about the original trilogy and is totally obsessed with the prequel trilogy, constantly posting the cringeworthy romance scenes from Attack of the Clones (I HATE SAND!) on Facebook and YouTube due to his not autism OCD fixation on Anakin Skywalker, because he feels like his own life is a mirror image of Anakin's. He clearly isn't willing to come clean with his true feelings: that the Star Wars prequels are the greatest cinematic masterpieces ever produced, and that Anakin Skywalker is the best written character of all time. (Jason's premature review of The Force Awakens)

-Jason heads to the Dayana Cadeau Classic. He walks up to every single supplement booth (including one manned by MMA fighter Daniel Straus) and immediately begins telling them that he's a /YouTuber with over 20,000 subscribers, his own t-shirt company, his own supplement company, that he's about to collab with Chris Jones, and that his coath is PJ Braun. "It's not a lie if you believe it." --George Costanza. Before leaving each booth, he grabs an entire handful of sample packets, giving birth to the new nickname "Sample Prick." (Jason Genova heads to the Dayana Cadeau)

-International YouTube celery Jason "Janoy" Giovanni Cresnova finally gets the recognition that he deserves: An article in the Miami New Times magazine. Amusingly, his picture on the cover page is next to the title "Bulk up for winter." One particularly great quote in the article from Andrew: "The whole story of Jason is him trying to become a professional bodybuilder. He tries and fails, tries and fails. Every time he gets close to succeeding, he slips down and starts from square one. It's a story that has no end." The article later won a Sigma Delta Chi Award for journalism. Next stop: Time Magazine.

-Adam Harper re-emerges in an unexpected way: having frequently done business with PJ Braun and Aaron Singerman in the past, he bought another $19,000 worth of Blackstone Labs supplements for his retail company Get Fit Fast. His primary method of reselling products was to aggressively undercut everybody else on Amazon and make up for the thin profit margins through sheer volume, but Amazon pulled Blackstone Labs products off their site due to their questionably safe ingredients. Because of this, Adam claims in a phone call that he can no longer find buyers and asks for a refund for the $19,000 worth of supplements, but PJ refuses because he's unhappy about Adam repeatedly violating an agreement to not sell their products below a certain price. Adam responds by claiming that he never received the supplements in the first place, threatening to issue a chargeback with his credit card company and take Blackstone Labs to court. PJ is confident that he'll win any court action because he has several pieces of evidence to prove that Adam is lying. Jason received a lot of hate for professing loyalty to PJ over Adam in a video a few months ago, but was he right all along? Adam warns PJ in the phone call: "I'm not small time." Rumour has it that Adam will be enlisting the services of ace attorney Scott Miller. (The PJ Braun vs Adam Harper controversy)

-PJ Braun is beginning to open up to Jason again, occasionally filming him for scenes in his new reality show, Beauty & Braun (no, the "Beauty" isn't Jason, it's PJ's wife). He also invites Jason to a private screening of the new Star Wars movie when it comes out. A number of bodybuilding industry celebrities will be there too, like Jay Cutler. Despite all these generous offers, Jason Jewnova attempts to sell PJ an autographed copy of the New Times magazine that he appeared in for $20.

-After the Paris terrorist attacks on November 13 in which 130 people were killed, Lord Vader calls for an Order 66 on ISIS for "Calling the French names, and saying they speak French and stuff like that." No apology video from ISIS yet. (The Order 66 on ISIS)

-People are beginning to worry about Janoy Cresva's mental health: He starts making videos where he begins talking about something normal like going to the gym, then suddenly and without warning, a spontaneous autism attack breaks out where he laughs like Woody Woodpecker and randomly yells out things like, "NATCHA BOY RIC FLAIR! WOOO! NATCHA BOY RIC FLAIR! WOOOO! WOOO!" and then reverts back to talking about what he was before as if nothing happened. (One example of many)

-Nate drives Jason to a Strength Camp event held by Elliot Hulse. Nate tells Jason, "Don't worry, I'll pay for all your Strength Camp stuff." Jason replies, "All right no problem." Pissening. There's a huge lineup to meet and take a picture with female physique champion Dana Linn Bailey. Jason gives zero fucks, completely ignores the line, walks straight up to Dana, puts on a pair of aviator sunglasses, takes some pics with her, gives her a copy of the New Times magazine that he was featured in, then leaves. With this, Jason Genova cements his status as the most alpha YouTuber. (Jason Genova meets Dana Linn Bailey)

-The Iron Extortionist has an impressive run of hustling money out of people: He convinces PJ Braun and Aaron Singerman to cough up $200 to fund his bodybuilding show in Hialeah, later convinces Lui Marco to give him $200 out of pity, and $300 from Chris Jones (also pity). Jason is absolutely convinced that Chris Jones is going to become his new coath and that he's going to commute all the way to Texas for coathing sessions. Chris Jones might not be aware that he's going to become Jason's coath, somebody ought to let him know. (Jason extorts money out of PJ and Aaron)

-Jason's NPC South Florida bodybuilding show at Hialeah goes down. It had very little hype around it because everybody just assumed that he was going to drop out like he usually does, so it comes as a surprise when he actually competes. Jason uses his signature technique of substituting spray tan with cooking oil. "Janoy looks like a Syrian refugee." --FitMisc user GenetalGiant. Although Nate was nice enough to drive Jason to the show, Jason instead credits former IFBB pro Mike Quinn with driving him in an attempt to gain cred. Jason finishes in last place out of four competitors. Amusingly, after the third and second place winners are announced, the two people left are Jason and a guy who looks just like Brad. Brad's doppelganger immediately begins celebrating before the first place winner is even announced, rightfully assuming that it's not going to be Jason. Jason is led off the stage in a visible state of shock and confusion. (Jason's humiliating loss at the NPC South Florida show)

-Controversy erupts when PJ Braun, in one of his Periscope videos, calls Jason autistic and says that he's gentle with him because "he's a little slow." Jason gets wind of the video and writes on his Facebook, "My heart so hurt. My own bother fuck me over I loved." Witnesses are worried that this will destroy the relationship between the two and bring an end to future ments. Not to worry: PJ gives Jason some free supplements and with that, all is forgiven. PJ is clearly taking his Beauty & Braun reality show very seriously and wants it to be successful. Hilariously, when he posts episodes that don't feature Jason, they are swamped with mass dislikes and troll comments from radical Witnesses (e.g. "Disliked and reported for lack of Jason"), essentially forcing PJ to include The Iron Extortionist in the videos. (PJ calls Jason autistic even though he is not autism)

-The Genovasphere is rocked by a scandalous phone call in which Jason blames the Delray Misfits for his problems with getting dislikes on all of his videos. He expresses a desire to leave them behind and do his own thing. He then tells the caller not to tell anybody. Jason also asks him to donate $1,000, and in Jason's infinite generosity, will send him some "free" t-shirts in return, because he's a humble human bean. The phone call causes the like/dislike ratio on all of his videos to plummet to Marc-Lobliner-After-Being-Order 66'd levels. It's feared that The Great Schism (The Great Pissm?) will be upon us where Genova's Witnesses will split into two factions of Genova loyalists and Delray Misfits defectors. It all turns out to be overblown when the Delray Misfits basically ignore the phone call because they understand by now that it's just Jason being Jason. (Phone call)

-Before the Boca Nutrition grand opening held by PJ and Aaron, Genova attempts to scam even more money out of them by making up a bizarre lie that he needs the cash to pick up his long lost, California state record holding, powerlifting half brother at the airport. He also makes up an even more bizarre lie that his girlfriend can't come to the Star Wars screening because she has a urinary tract infection. Nate goes with him instead (Jason said he'd bring his girlfriend, and he shows up with Transsexual Nate, sickening). Jason was actually promoted as a celebrity guest star on advertisements for the Boca Nutrition grand opening event, but he is treated rather disrespectfully when he gets there, not getting his own booth and is quickly pushed out of the way by the Blackstone Labs entourage escorting Kai Greene when Jason attempts to greet him. Pitifully, the Iron Traveling Salesman is reduced to walking around the event with a big cardboard box full of "Enjoy The Ment" t-shirts and trying to sell them to random people for 15 buck each. (Jason's pitiful appearance at the Boca Nutrition grand opening)

-It turns out that Jason's imaginary girlfriend who got a urinary tract infection might actually be real: A minor Instagram star named Christina "oldschoolbikini" Romanova. She has a fairly decent body, and as for her face, well ... It's not ugly, but it's unique, let's just say that. She is employed by Marc Lobliner as a writer for Tiger Fitness. She claims that she was in classes for gifted children and says that she's going to be a neurosurgeon soon, despite the fact that she writes at an elementary school level (example article). Perhaps she misunderstood the meaning of her "Special Education" classes. Witnesses are suspicious that she's just leading Jason on and using him for Instagram followers (her popularity explodes after getting involved with Jason), but she soon makes a video confirming that they are in an online relationship together and crowns herself "The Piss Queen." Jason sends her a Christmas present: Two boxes full of Blackstone Labs supplements that he got for free from PJ and Aaron. (oldschoolbikini announces that she's Jason's girlfriend)

-The equally delusional oldschoolbikini and Jason seem like a match made in potato heaven. Unfortunately, the video she made about being Jason's girlfriend is suddenly deleted as well as her title of "The Piss Queen" on her Instagram description. It's rumoured that her boss Marc Lobliner cockblocked Jason by ordering her to delete references to Jason on her Instagram. A renegade pisstrooper general named Misc Celltech Brah leads an Order 66 on his own against "Marc Lobsterliner, my favourite natural crustacean." Jason makes a video ordering the pisstroopers to stop attacking Marc, presumably because oldschoolbikini told him to because she's in danger of losing her job. The pisstrooper army is getting more and more out of Jason's control. He makes a video declaring that he is no longer Lord Vader because he has found God and turned to the light side, it's sickening, it's pissening, it Acts 26:18ening. "My soul is erected." --Jason Genova. (Jason Genova turns to the light side)

-Marc Pocketliner threatens to sue mentally disabled bagboy Jason Genova in response to the attack from pisstroopers (who he claims are harassing his family), even though Jason had nothing to do with it and in fact tried to stop it. "I don't give a care." --Tony Montana, Scarface (1983). It's also discovered that oldschoolbikini already has a boyfriend, and she's cut off communication with Jason; at first, Jason deludes himself into believing that she's cheating on her boyfriend for him because he's a jacked YouTube celery, but he eventually accepts the truth that she was using him for followers all along. Although Jason had recently converted to the light side, he falls to the dark side once again (his soul was erected, but sometimes it goes flaccid). Despite Jason's approval rating being at an all time low in recent months, Witnesses cheer the return of Lord Vader after Jewbliner and oldschoolpotato's scumbag ways are exposed, and Jason enjoys full support from the pisstroopers once again. Even Brad appears in a video expressing support.

(Pocketliner explains his legal threat)

-Lord Vader issues a devastating Order 66 from a newly unified pisstrooper army on oldschoolbikini and her master Marc Lobliner. Marc is quickly forced to disable comments and Likes/Dislikes on his YouTube channel, and oldschoolbikini shuts down her Instagram. All of her potato articles on Tiger Fitness, which had been deservedly downvoted to 1 star, magically climb back up to 4.5 stars with fake votes. This also casts suspicion on the authenticity of Marc's supplements all receiving perfect 5 star ratings, and Witnesses begin contacting the Better Business Bureau to investigate Tiger Fitness for fraud. Lobliner has clearly built his company by using sneaky and underhanded methods, like paying off Jason Blaha (who had previously been an extremely vocal critic of the supplement industry) to shill his products. Marc promoted Bio Gro as the next big thing in the supplement industry then later claimed that he never hyped up Bio Gro that much when it turned out to be useless. His YouTube channel also has nearly 300,000 subscribers, but most of his videos struggle to crack 6,000 views, suggesting that he may have bought fake subscribers. Some conspiracy theorists believe that oldschoolbikini was planted by Marc Lowrider from the beginning to manipulate Jason as revenge for the Order 66 he suffered a few months ago.

-The Adam Harper v. PJ Braun dispute takes an unexpected turn with the credit card company favouring Adam, despite all of the evidence to the contrary: they declare the text messages and phone calls between PJ and Adam to be unreliable evidence of Adam picking up the shipment of supplements. PJ's fatal flaw was not writing up an official invoice for the supplement order. He claims that he was casual about invoices with Adam because they were friends, although it's possible that the real reason was to save money on taxes. PJ threatens to file a criminal charge of grand theft against Adam. With both parties wanting the ordeal to be over with, they settle out of court with PJ providing Adam a partial refund, even though Adam had already sold most of the products that he essentially stole. This will probably spell the end of any future relationship between Jason and Adam. If PJ forbade Jason from hanging around with Jonas for making him look foolish in a few videos, just imagine how mad he would be if Jason hung around with a guy who basically stole $19,000 from PJ -- and when forced to choose between Adam or "PeeJay", we all know whom Jason is going to choose. In any case, this incident has proved beyond any doubt the existence of The Ment as a divine entity, and how people's destinies revolve around Jason Genova. It couldn't have been some random guy who ripped off former coath PJ and created a bunch of legal drama, it just had to be former coath Adam. (PJ explains the legal dispute with Adam)

-Jason announces that he is coming out with his own supplement line and clothing company, "Sickening Supps." Witnesses initially brush this off because he has been talking about doing this for years now, and nothing ever came of it. This time, however, Genova seems serious and is more aggressive when talking about it, probably taking inspiration from PJ Braun and his lavish CEO 10K a day lifestyle of Ferarris, big houses, and hot fit chicks on his dick all day. Witnesses begin to dream up all the possibilities: "Not In The A.M. Bro" pre-workout, "Hindenburg LXT" mass gainer ... Jason says that he wants to make products that actually work, unlike every other supplement company out there (he indirectly talks shit about Blackstone Labs with this statement, pissening). The Iron Philanthropist also claims that he will give back to the community and pay all of his sponsored athletes a starting salary of $30,000 per year. Jason announces that he has started sponsoring people, and this is actually confirmed when Witnesses begin to find Instagram accounts of people who declare that they are sponsored by Sickening Supps. The quality of these "athletes" is indicative of the true budget of the Iron Jew. Jason talks about wanting to hire Albert Einstein to put illegal amphetamines into his pre-workout but still get around the FDA. Jason will probably end up putting Sickening Supps stickers over his sizable cache of Blackstone Labs supplements and selling them.

-Jason claims that he has been contacted by Fox News and that they want to interview him on Friday at 3:50 PM "before the politics debate." This sounds believable at first, especially in light of the fact that the New Times magazine genuinely did a story on him recently, but upon closer inspection, the red flags of this being a troll job become apparent: 350 is an auspicious number in Misc culture because it's "tree fiddy," and Jason stating that he's being interviewed before the politics might be referencing the Genova meme of blaming "politics" for every loss he suffers in a bodybuilding show. Even more suspiciously, Jason gives a shoutout to Gideon, who might be referencing the infamous $3.50 birthday gift, and he gives a shoutout to the well known troll Adam Pollard. The Delray Misfits express doubt about the interview's authenticity despite Jason's insistence that IT'S LEGIIIIIIIIIIIT! Jason later announces that his interview is being moved to Saturday because the Fox News station suffered a serious kitchen leak, and this ridiculous new development puts the whole thing to bed and is never mentioned again. (Jason's Fox interview delayed due to serious kitchen leak)

-The Sith Lord becomes fixated on the idea that Natalie Portman Liked his Instagram video. This is important because Jason thinks that he's Anakin Skywalker and is therefore obsessed with the idea of marrying Princess Amidala from the Star Wars prequels, even going so far as to base his fake dead fiancee Jennifer on her. When Nate asks him how he's so sure that it's the real Natalie Portman, he replies that there are 30 Natalie Portman accounts on Instagram, but she must run one of them. Jason contacts the person who runs the Natalie Portman account that Liked his video, and the person straight up tells Jason that he's not actually Natalie Portman. This just makes Jason believe that she's denying it because she's in love with him but doesn't want the world to know. This gives some insight into the inner workings of Pudding Head's brain: rather than gather facts about a situation and make a conclusion based on them, he instead creates a preconceived conclusion about the situation, then fits the facts into this conclusion. (NATALIE PORTMAN, SHE'S IN LOVE WITH MEEEE)

-Jason finally finds the chemistry genius that he's been looking for to get his supplement company off the ground: A freshman college student named Austin. They announce the grand opening of the Sickening Supps clothing store: It's the shittiest looking website of all time (yes, even worse than Genovapedia), powered by a poverty website template called Weebly. The t-shirt designs are horrendous and unimaginative, not making use of the infinite creative possibilities of the Genovaverse. One of the shirts just has a generic picture of an eagle holding a barbell (which was stolen from somewhere) with the text "Sickening Supps" below it. T-shirt prices fluctuate wildly throughout the day. Under shipping information it says: "Should ship fast." Under return policy: "No returns." Sounds reassuring. The website also advertises a special sale of 0% off (I really wish that I could make this shit up). (Picture)

-Jason and Austin are so goddamn incompetent that the Sickening Supps operation doesn't even last one full day before blowing up in their faces. Austin says that the website got hacked, which actually means that one of the potatoes gave out the password or it was simply guessed (it was probably something really obvious like "sickening" or "Darth Vader"). What's more, a major scandal looms because, unbelievably, people were actually stupid enough to buy $700 worth of shirts, and they demand refunds after the website disappears. It turns out that the shirts never even existed. Jason and Austin planned to take all the money as pre-orders and then make the shirts later. Jason denies that he has the $700, claiming that he's "a poor pauper. Not a nickle, not a dime" and throws his business partner under the bus, saying that it's his problem. Jason later makes a video admitting that he stole "A couple hundred bucks, it's not that bad, I'm entitled to it, I'm a human bean." It's discovered that he was lured into making this video by somebody offering him a fake MuscleTech sponsorship if he confessed to stealing the money. It looks like Jason's "Craig Titus prison rape workout video" might actually become a reality ... however, Austin later comes out and proves that he refunded everybody who ordered shirts, but Jason tried to stop him because he wanted to pocket the money instead ("It's an investment in the company, they'll understand bro, they're freaks"). Austin states that after all the smoke cleared, the $700 was totally refunded, and the only person who lost money was himself because Jason owes him $60 for buying the failed website. This means that Jason lied about stealing hundreds of dollars in order to secure a MuscleTech sponsorship, which isn't really surprising considering he once lied about shooting steroids in order to get out of admitting that he cheated on his diet. (Austin eggsplains the situation)

-Jason successfully deflects attention off his attempt to steal $700 by somehow doing something even worse shortly after: sending a 17 year old girl a video of himself jacking off. Despite the blurry video quality and lack of any distinguishing human features other than a hand and a cock, there can be no doubt as to who it is: the telltale brass bedposts of Genova are visible along with the rest of the 1950s decor of his grandma's former home, with Jason's Star Wars poster just out of frame. Survivors who witnessed this video report that it's not the visual that haunts them but the audio, because Jason makes a strange sound as he approaches climax that can only be described as goat-like, truly living up to his nickname, "The Gunting Goat." Any hopes of the video quickly being suppressed and forgotten about are dashed as news of it spreads across the Internet. Several YouTube fitness celeries even chime in with their own worthless opinions on the matter for views
despite knowing nothing about the situation or the law (hey everybody it's Jason Blaha here). Jason apparently sent the video to a girl who decided to lead him on to get attention in a Facebook group, but she ended up getting more than she bargained for ... amusingly, prior to the incident, Ron Harris was spotted on Facebook warning Jason about talking to the girl because she looked young, to which Jason responded, "Stop talk shit." Jason finally admits to being mentally challenged in a response video, which is a milestone since he has always denied it. However, it's entirely possible that The Iron Scam Artist doesn't actually believe it and in his mind he's lying to everyone about being mentally challenged in order to save his own ass legally. Andrew and Brad make Jason promise that from now on, any girl who wants to see his dick has to come over to his house and suck it. (Video. No, not the video of Jason whacking off if that's what you're worried about)

-It's the end of an era: "The Mecca of Bodybuilding," World Gym, formerly known as Delray Fitness, closes down. Word is that management was behind on paying rent. The gym's instantly recognizable ugly green glow was a mainstay in videos for years. The deplorable conditions and incompetent management are actually what enabled Jason Genova and Delray Misfits videos to be made in the first place; no gym with sane management would have allowed the frequent occurrences of loud swearing, Lenny blowing snot all over the equipment, Big Jay Masters bleeding all over the equipment, and the filming inside the change rooms. A notice is posted on the locked door of World Gym that memberships will be honoured at Palm Beach Gym.

-Jason finally suffers the consequences of posting copyright infringing Star Wars videos on his Lord Vader channel when it gets taken over by Disney, with 70% of the ad revenue being redirected to them. At first Jason is upset and accuses Mickey Mouse of stealing 70% of his money. However, he eventually comes to see it as a positive thing, reasoning that they were generous in allowing him to keep 30% of the revenue. He quickly begins wearing Mickey Mouse shirts and bragging to random people that he's sponsored by Disney. (Jason's channel confiscated by Mickey Mouse)

-Jason, Andrew, Brad, and Lenny issue a rare lifetime Order 66 against Jason Blaha. Genova's Witnesses from the Jason Genova megathread at the FitMisc forum had spawned a spinoff thread dedicated to hating on the fat "fitness expert" Blaha because of his fraudulent credentials and cringeworthy alpha male tough guy act. The thread was slow for a while, but the Blahautism campaign rapidly intensifies and becomes even bigger than the Genova thread as the pisstroopers discover that Jason Blaha is a massive scumbag who committed disability fraud, lied about being a CIA-trained combat veteran, and countless other things. He's forced to spend 12 hours a day deleting comments and banning people from his YouTube channel so his fans don't learn the truth (not a big deal for him since he doesn't have a job and hasn't worked in over a decade). (Order 66 Jason Bloho)

-Genova becomes obsessed with the idea of charging people $3,000 a day to hang out with him. He believes it's a bargain because Natalie Portman charges $17,000, which is where he got the idea from. He says, "$17,000 an hour, that's RETARDED MONEY! WHO WOULD PAY THAT?? I'll do it, I'll pay it!" Jason plots a way to steal $17,000 from his mother. He's pessimistic about his chances of having sex with Natalie Portman even after ponying up all that cash: "She's got bodyguards all on her dick!" (Jason's new money-making scheme)

-Predictably, the Delray Misfits are quickly kicked out of Palm Beach Gym for the antics that they regularly enjoyed engaging in at World Gym. They are now without a home; rumour has it that Jason Genova trains at LA Fitness. Andrew and Brad journey there, find The Spaniard, and join him. The rest of the Misfits are still scattered across various gyms. Andrew is reluctant to film Jason as often as he did before in fear of getting kicked out again, so Brad, who doesn't give a shit, becomes a frequent camera man for Jason. His acerbic commentary is a hit among Witnesses and brings some flavour to Jason's usual boring workouts and locker room posing sessions. Although Brad is known for mocking and bullying Jason, an odd friendship begins to blossom between the two as Brad begins to spend more time with Jason inside and outside of the gym.

-Jason and Nate take a road trip to Miami to attend the grand opening of the Iron Addicts gym. Jason finds out that his rival and Order 66 victim Marc Lobliner is inside the gym. Marc once claimed that if confronted by Genova, he would tell him to get out of his face. Well, Genova decides to put that claim to the test. Surprisingly, Pocketliner is cordial with him. The two shake hands and make peace. With this, the pisstroopers appear to forgive Pocketliner for his past transgressions and the Order 66 on him expires, especially after he lends his services to help expose his former friend Jason Blaha, who is currently the target of the most thorough and destructive Order 66 in history as the Blaha Wars continue to rage on (Blaha will live to regret the day he crossed Jason Genova. See Blahapedia for more information). Lord Vader even lets Lobliner call an Order 66 on Shredz because of the recent scandal of photoshopping their athletes. (Genova meets Lobliner)

-Next, Jason and Nate head to Orlando to attend the Europa fitness expo where Rich Piana, another Order 66 victim, is in attendance. Jason shakes hands with him and gives his usual spiel that he's the famous YouTube celery Jason Genova. The Piano Man stops to think for a moment and says that his name sounds familiar. He realizes that Genova was the one responsible for Order 66ing him many months ago. Eyewitnesses at the scene report that the 300 pound Piana had a crazed look in his eyes, as if he was on cocaine. He tells Jason that he was pissed off about his social media being overrun by pisstroopers and asks Jason to explain himself. Jason replies, "Is jus a joke bro, a funny joke," which is his go-to line that he has used to explain everything from being caught lying to engaging in acts of homosexuality. It doesn't work this time. Piana is not satisfied and says that he wants to slap Jason to get back at him. Jason declines and nervously suggests that they have a posedown instead. Piana isn't having any of it and suggests that they have a slapboxing match for five seconds. Jason reluctantly accepts ... what happens next sends shockwaves throughout the bodybuilding world: Piana slaps the shit out of Jason, hitting him with blows that are far harder than what was expected out of a friendly, joking slapboxing match as spectators look on in horror. After it's all over, Piana shakes hands with Jason (who looks like he's holding back tears) and makes him promise to never Order 66 him again. Andrew had once prophetically warned Jason that some day he was going to Order 66 the wrong person and get the shit beat out of him. The slapboxing incident has cast a dark cloud over the once amusing practice of Order 66ing various targets of Lord Vader's choosing. (Rich Piana slapboxes Jason Genova)

-The slapboxing video rapidly becomes the most popular Jason Genova video of all time, with over a million views. The fitness scene explodes with news of the incident, and even some mainstream news outlets report on the mentally disabled man getting beat up by a huge bodybuilder. The Piano Man is finally forced to make a video addressing this public relations disaster: He claims that he didn't know about Janoy's mental problems and says that when he was Order 66'd some months back, he and his wife received death threats from the pisstroopers all over his social media. He came to the conclusion that they were all fake accounts that Genova had made himself, which is kind of funny when you think about it. It's possible that he believed that Jason Genova alone was responsible for ALL of the troll comments that he received on his YouTube videos and Instagram posts (Piano's YouTube comments are literally 99% trolls making fun of him, it's almost impossible to find a serious one). Piana expresses an interest in doing a collaboration video with Genova to patch things up. In wake of all this, Genova's channel gets 10,000 new subscribers as people become curious about the bizarre tale of the Sith Lord. Genova, whose number one priority in life is always views and subscribers (with dignity far down the list), later admits that getting the piss slapped out of him by Piano was the best thing that ever happened to him. (Piana's explanation)

-Genova guest stars on the International Iron radio show with his on again, off again nemesis Lee Priest. Jason calls in and quickly takes over the show, hyperactively giving listeners an extended history lesson of his bodybuilding career, hardly letting anyone else get in a word. Lee takes shots at Jason throughout the whole show, all of which go right over his head. Some highlights:

Jason: I was totally natural in that show, 100% natural.
Lee: We can tell.

Jason: I came out big, and hard.
Lee: And delusional.

Jason: When I'm getting ready for a show, my mom can't be around me because we fight like cats and dogs, I'm so moody, she can't handle it when I'm carb depleted like that.
Lee: Probably wishing she had an abortion.

Jason: My coach really pushed me hard to get ready for that show.
Lee: Should have pushed you down the stairs.

Jason: I bought my mom a nice diamond earring.
Lee: Just one?

Jason's mother can also be heard yelling at Jason for talking on the phone halfway through the interview. (Interview)

-After the Sickening Supps disaster, Genova enlists the aid of Andrew and Brad to sell a new line of t-shirts to assure fans that those two will be in charge of the website this time instead of the Scamlord. Genova also seeks some real professional help for creating his own line of supplements, and PJ Braun expresses a desire to help him out in this regard. He wants to make a Jason Genova themed pre-workout and donate some of the proceedings to an autism charity (now why did he pick that charity I wonder?). He also offers to have Genova officially diagnosed by a medical professional to see what exactly is wrong with him. Can PJ Braun solve one of the saga's greatest unsolved mysteries? (The potential deal to make a Genova pre-workout)

-After months of Rich Piana being hounded by both Genova and the pisstroopers to do his promised collaboration with the Piss Lord, it finally goes down. The Piano Man gives Genova a boxing lesson, and they also do a workout session together. The highlight of the collab might be the opening shot showing Genova and Piana exiting the limousine and waddling toward the gym entrance, both afflicted with severe invisible lats syndrome (video). The YouTube marketing machine Jason Genova wears some dumb skull and crossbones shirt instead of capitalizing on the huge amount of publicity surrounding this event to advertise his new clothing line. Genova attempts to motivate Piana during his sets by yelling out, "Nothin but a penis!" The Iron Reverse Fake Natty claims to be taking trenbolone, testosterone, and 6 IUs of human growth hormone. When Piana asks him if he's running test acetate or test enanthate, Genova responds, "BOTH!" Piana naively believes that this collaboration will finally put the slapboxing incident to bed and stop Genova from blowing up his phone every day. Little does he know that the horror has only just begun ... Genova's Curse hits hard and early, with Piana divorcing his wife Sara soon after the collab. Jason "The Delray Playboy" Genova claims that he took Sara out to Red Lobster and that this inflamed Rich's jealousy. (Collab video part 1 | part 2)

The Businessman Era (July 2016 - December 2016)

-A new coath arrives on the scene: Jonny Fitness, an ex-cop who was thrown off the force for some questionable conduct. For whatever reason, he's now decided to sponsor Genova and says that he will pay him $100 for every pound that he loses. Jonny offers to pay for Jason's plane ticket to come with him to a block party in New York City where PJ Braun and many other bodybuilding celeries will be in attendance, but his mom won't let him. Jason calls his mom the "Gains Goblin." He later comes out with a video claiming that he's considering suing his mom because she steals all his YouTube money and is ruining his life, but it's quickly deleted (video). But not to worry: Jason's new sugar daddy Jonny Fitness takes the plane ticket money and instead buys Jason some expensive new clothes, shoes, sunglasses, and a haircut. Jonny also gets Jason sponsored by a place called Florida Meals, which makes packages of prepared food so Chef Crackhead won't have to worry about attempting to cook anymore. Jonny takes him inside Florida Meals and tells him to pick out a few as samples, Genova promptly proceeds to fill up his entire bag as Jonny watches helplessly. (The $100 for every pound challenge)

-Andrew writes a heartfelt post announcing that he's no longer going to be making gym videos because the Misfits are no longer able to get away with what they were doing at World Gym. He says that he will still film the occasional special video outside of the gym, but this effectively brings an end to the Delray Misfits series on YouTube as we know it. Jonny Fitness is thus counted on by Witnesses to be the saviour of ments. Jonny says that he's getting Jason a tattoo, risking not only Jane's wrath but Lenny's for making Jason a cookie cutter with a tattoo. Sickening G4P vibes abound as Jonny makes a strange video where he has Jason take off his shirt for a weigh-in, zooms in on Jason's nipples, and remarks, "Those are nice. Those are fucking beautiful." Witnesses begin to wonder just what Jonny's intentions are and what he's hoping to get out of it by spending so much money on the Piss Lord. (Genova strips and weighs himself)

-After days of hype, Jason finally reveals his new tattoo: if you look very closely, it's a Darth Vader helmet, but it looks like a giant black smudge on his shoulder. Jonny claims that he signed as Jason's legal guardian in order to get him the tattoo, and now Jane is taking Jonny to court over it. At last, in an Instagram video, it's revealed that it was one big prank and the tattoo is fake. But never mind that; the more important revelation is that Jason spent the night with a tranny prostitute named Jazmin Star, who apparently tried to get Jason to pay for breast implants. "I don't care if she's a tranny, she's still a woman to me." --Jason Genova (Jason justifies hooking up with a tranny)

-Jason kills yet another coath, announcing that he's split with Jonny. Jason claims that Jonny was a bad influence and was using Jason for his fame. Furthermore, he claims that Jonny was talking shit about Jason's "girl" Jazmin, PJ Braun, Adam, and told Jason to stay away from the Delray Misfits. In fact, the Misfits had an epic video lined up with Lenny and the whole crew, but Jonny convinced Jason not to show up and to do the gay fake tattoo video with him instead. Jason gleefully details how he exploited Jonny for money, free clothes, and a new computer before dumping him, to the approval of Andrew and Brad. The Iron Extortionist proves to be impossible to exploit; whoever tries ends up getting exploited far worse themselves, it's so sickening. Jason is still seeing the tranny as well, whom Brad dubs "Shim." When Andrew asks if she still has a dick, Jason reassures him, "It will be off very soon." (Jason explains his tranny, why he dumped Jonny Fitness, and lights firecrackers out his ass, part 1) (Part 2)

-Witnesses sharply criticize Andrew and Brad for what seems like the first time ever because of them enabling Jason's scumbag behaviour toward Jonny. Upon reflection, it makes little sense that Jonny was "using" Jason for his fame, since he's only famous in the tiny niche community of YouTube bodybuilding, and he was spending far more money on Jason than he could have possibly hoped to get out of it. It seems likely that Jason turned on Jonny because he wanted Jason to get rid of his precious tranny and put an end to their late night lightsaber duels. Despite being made aware of Jason talking shit, Jonny refuses to abandon him, because he feels sorry for him and says that Jason is just confused and paranoid. Jonny insists that he will continue to help The Iron Ingrate. There are now three rival factions competing for Jason's love: The Delray Misfits, the Jonas Crew, and Jonny. (Jonny Fitness explains his side of the story)

-The Trannypocalypse is upon us as Shim takes over all of Jason's social media accounts and bizarre new details emerge about the situation: Instagram messages from a month earlier of Jonny hitting on Shim are discovered, and all attempts to contact Jonny to explain himself result in being blocked. Shim makes a Periscope video with Jason, and throughout the whole thing she argues with her ex-lover via phone who turns out to be the seemingly minor Genovaverse character former coath Wesley (the goober who once appeared in a workout video with Genova)! She taunts Wesley with, "You loved suckin and fuckin this dick!" It seems like the whole purpose of getting together with Genova was to make Wesley jealous and to get Jason to call an Order 66 on him. It's also discovered that PJ Braun follows Shim on Instagram. Forget about a love triangle, this is a goddamn tranny love heptagon. At least they don't have to worry about Big Lenny since he already has his own tranny girlfriend. You really cannot make this shit up. Welcome to Florida, boys. (The Trannypocalypse, part 1) | (Part 2)

-Witnesses are shocked when a video called, "JASON GENOVA KIDNAPPED" is uploaded: the tranny love heptagon appears to have reached its horrifying climax as Jason is shown gagged and tied to a chair while Jonny roasts Jason and "The Delray Shitfits" for their transgressions. He calls Jason a liar and forces him to call an Order 66 on himself. But then Jonny says that despite all of Jason's faults ... he will always be his friend. It's a truly touching video, and Witnesses are impressed by Jonny's forgiving nature. Still doesn't explain those private messages he sent to Shim, though. (Jason Genova kidnapped)

-Jason's Florida Meals sponsorship is cut off after they get bought out by Fresh Meals. He spends 16 minutes lying to Jonny about various topics: when the Sickening Supps t-shirt scandal is brought up, for example, he blames Austin 100% and calls him a scammer, even though it was proven otherwise. The Iron Reverse Fake Natty claims that he's receiving 250 mg of testosterone, 250 mg of tren, 6-7 IUs of human growth hormone, and 6 mg of Anavar from the doctor. He also claims that his mother Jane the Gains Goblin is okay with it. He insists that it does not hurt his libido, though: "I get hardness. I get boners." Jonny, once disliked by Witnesses for being boring and creepy, is quickly improving his ability to extract ments from Jason with his laid back style of questioning that doesn't cause Jason to get defensive and shut down. Can Jonny be the next Adam Harper? He is also open to squashing the beef with the Delray Misfits. (Jonny questions Jason about various topics)

-In random disturbing news, a 19 year old college student named Austin Harrouff murders and eats the faces of an older couple who were sitting in their garage minding their own business. The murderer is a confirmed Genova's Witness who mentioned Jason Genova in a video just days before eating their faces, and he had even made multiple tribute videos of Genova. Just another day in Florida, boys. It's possible that the ment depletion drove Austin to insanity. (News article)

-A sore appears under Genova's lip and grows larger over time. Witnesses speculate as to whether it's an innocent pimple or if he caught herpes from sucking his girlfriend's dick.

-The Florida Meals that Genova took a month ago re-emerge in a video where he still has them all in his fridge, despite the company being out of business for weeks. He also picks up a package in the fridge with contents that look entirely green; Jonny identifies it as "cheese." Genova is in the worst shape of his entire life. During the Hindenburg Era, he was huge, but at least he looked big, and his strength was at an all time high. Now he just looks like shit, straight up. It almost looks like Shim got him pregnant. He continues waffling on whether or not he's doing a bodybuilding show this year. (Jonny Fitness visits Genova's condo of doom)

-Genova clearly doesn't even lift anymore, and the quality of his videos takes a nosedive. He says that he's entering the businessman era now and just wants to be a celebrity rather than a bodybuilder because bodybuilding is too corrupt. He usually just repeats his mantra, "It's sick, it's piss, it's revolting, it's insulting," over and over again. In fact, he's gotten too lazy to even do that and often just lies on his infamous brass bed (now known as "The Fapmobile") and shortens it to, "Sick. Piss. Revolting. Insulting." He constantly deletes videos that have a large number of dislikes, and Witnesses are pounding Jason's videos with dislikes almost as hard as Shim is pounding Jason's asshole.

-Big Lenny's arch-nemesis DALE!!!!! Dale Chance drives 10 hours down to Delray Beach for a much anticipated Delray Misfits collab video. The Iron Extortionist shows up to Dale's hotel room at 4:00 AM and tries to get him to buy him breakfast. Delray Misfits fans are annoyed at Jason butting in and trying to make himself the centre of attention during Lenny and Dale's legendary encounter. The good news is that Shim appears to be out of the picture now; Jason later claims that Jane the Gains Goblin put a restraining order on it. Jason also says that he, Lenny, and Dale will all be competing in the Ruby Championships next year. (Dale confronts Lenny, part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5)

-Jonny's offer to make peace with the Delray Misfits is pulled off the table after the Dale Chance video because Jonny is unhappy with what they said about him. He claims that Andrew and Brad were lying when they said that they invited him to be in the video, and even if they were to invite him, he would have refused anyway; he lambasts the Misfits for "belittling and mocking a mentally handicapped person" in Jason. Jonny demonstrates potato reasoning in his video and sounds like Poonycheeps and Marc Lobsterliner when they tried to white knight Genova and insulted Genova's Witnesses. Jonny also reveals some videos where he creepily filmed Jason with a hidden camera and even a private conversation Jonny had with Jason's mom. Public opinion has once again swung in favour of the Delray Misfits in the Misfits vs Jonny feud. Jonny confirms that Jason isn't interested in dieting anymore, and he no longer wants to hook Jason up with free Fresh Meals after the fiasco with the Florida Meals rotting in his fridge. He says that Genova is a manipulative asshole who constantly talks shit about everyone who helps him. (Jonny Fitness re-ignites the feud with the Delray Misfits)

-The Mellon Dollar Man says he's retiring from bodybuilding soon and is going to be a movie star instead. He has delusions of being paid $250,000 for a movie, which he will be doing from November 2017 to 2019. "Worst case scenario I make $50,000-$100,000." He then talks about putting the money in a "high interest security CD," which doubles every year for ten years and making 3-4 mellon dollars. He's already thinking ahead and worrying about getting more movie deals after that or if he'll just be a one hit wonder. He writes on Instagram that he'll be driving a "Royal Roy's" within two years. (Jason Genova's eggsplains his movie deal)

-The previously inseparable PJ Braun and Aaron Singerman had split up amicably months earlier as the latter went off to start his own company, but serious bad blood is brewing between them now: PJ accuses Aaron of stealing an e-mail clients list from the Blackstone Labs database in order to sell them products for his own company, RedCon1. PJ is even hinting at taking legal action against Aaron. Another case for ace attorney Scott Miller? Lord Vader calls an Order 66 on Aaron Singerman for "stealing all of PJ's formulas" even though that's not what happened. Genova also calls another Order 66 on Jason Blaha, whose channel is rapidly dying after losing 2/3 of his views since being exposed for stolen valor by the pisstroopers. It's a bit redundant since Blaha was already under a lifetime Order 66, but it's a nice reminder to destroy the biggest scumbag on YouTube. The Delray Misfits sign up to Busy Body Fitness in Boca, the scene of Genova's infamous leg workout video with PJ Braun from 2012. Genova discovers that he's banned from the juice bar there because it's owned by Aaron Singerman. (Singerman bans Genova from the juice bar after being Order 66'd)

-Jason announces the debut of his mom's sickening new cooking channel, although it suffers a setback because Jason ate all the food in the fridge that was supposed to feed four people. She gets 2,300 subscribers before she even makes her first video. The response from Witnesses is overwhelmingly positive, and they plot for a way to have Jane the Gains Goblin overtake Jason in subscribers so they can witness the ments from him flipping out. (Cooking with Chef Jane)

-Jason talks for weeks about being paid to do a celebrity guest appearance at a kava bar called Kavasutra. The Misfits are doubtful since this boy has cried wolf so many times before, and they suspect another mysterious kitchen leak canceling the event, but this time it actually turns out to be true. Genova gets his own table at the bar and autographs photoshopped pictures of himself to a surprisingly long line of Genova's Witnesses. This photo is a hilarious contrast between the fantasy depicted in the picture and the reality. At the end of the night, the Mellon Dollar Man peels off in a car that he identifies as a "1950Somethin Chevrolette Corvette Or Whatever It Is." (Jason Genova's celebrity appearance at Kavasutra)

-With news of the category 4 Hurricane Matthew about to hit Delray Beach, most sane people flee the city or at least board up their houses and hide inside. Brad drives his mail truck through the abandoned streets and sees what appears to be a fat old woman waddling around, but upon closer inspection, it's actually Janoy Cresva with his shorts hiked up to his stomach. Janoy defiantly goes outside and flexes during the hurricane, declaring, "We don't care about frickin Hurricane Matthew, we're freaks baby!" (Jason Genova refuses to back down to Hurricane Matthew)

-Lord Vader goes on another Order 66 spree, calling for them against Chris Jones, Vitaly, and Nikki Blackketter (for breaking up with Chris "Gooma," even though Genova Order 66'd Gooma not that long ago). He even makes a video with Jonny Fitness where Jason appears to be off his meds, saying, "Order 66 everyone on the planet," and, "Order 66 all grocery stores except Publix." The once feared Order 66 has officially lost all its power and meaning. (The Order 66 spree)

-Genova and the Delray Misfits drive to Port Charlotte to attend the bodybuilding show of another one of Big Lenny's rivals, MMMMMMMMEL CHANCEY!!!! While there, they get to meet Hulk Hogan. Genova immediately launches into his spiel about being a YouTube celery and asks Hulk Hogan to do his famous "Gimme a hell yeah!" line; we are reminded of the time that Jason's mom met Don King in Costco and said that she really loved his "I have a dream" speech (video). The experience of meeting Hulk Hogan inflates Genova's ego to dizzying proportions, and afterwards, he talks shit about the late Zyzz, telling him to bow down before him because he's far more famous and has met more celebrities than Zyzz. Lenny even fools Jason into believing that Hulk Hogan was the one who was excited because he got to meet Jason Genova. (The Delray Misfits meet Hulk Hogan)

-It's discovered that in the Delray Misfits version of the Hulk Hogan video, Lenny was shooting the shit with a slightly drunk Hogan and was about to get him to talk shit about DALE!!!! But Genova butted in and insisted on getting a picture, ending any potential ment. This causes a massive, long lasting backlash against Genova, especially in light of the current ment drought caused by a hotly anticipated Halloween party video's release being delayed (rumoured to be because of Jay Masters' actions during the party being too messed up for YouTube), and Jason's videos are disliked into oblivion. Jason makes a bunch of webcam videos complaining that he's down dumps because his life sucks and everyone hates him. "I just wanna swim with dolphins ... I just want to go on a deserted island, live alone, and evolve." --Monkey Prick (Feel cold fans, down dumps)

-Eager to restore the power of the Order 66, Lord Vader calls for one on Rich Piana's ex-wife, Sara, for using Rich for a green card. Most of Jason's fans now hate him, but a few loyal pisstroopers form a coalition with The Piano Man's large Russian fanbase and force her to abandon her Instagram. Jason tells Rich that he now owes him a collab video. Lord Vader calls yet another Order 66 on Zyzz's brother Chestbrah for calling Jason "a retarded midget." In light of Donald Trump's recent win in the US presidential election, Lord Vader orders his legion to deport Chestbrah "back over the wall where he came from, Australia." (Order 66 Chest)

-Genova claims that the new computer Jonny bought him is broken and demands that a fan send him a new one. Trolls from every corner of the world get together and claim that they're sending him a huge array of expensive gifts: MacBooks, cars, motorbikes, video game consoles, TVs, watches, and more. Andrew and Brad try telling him that he's getting trolled again because it makes no sense to give Jason thousands of dollars worth of merchandise for free, but he insists that IT'S LEGIIIIIT because they're all rich Saudi Arabians. They make a bet that if the gifts are real, Brad has to shave his Civil War general beard off. If they're fake, Brad and Andrew get to shave "trolled again" into Pudding Head's hair. (More Spaniard delusions)

-After a bunch more pointless Order 66s (including one against Brad on his birthday for refusing to believe that Jason is receiving free cars), a guy named Annoying Biker gets into Jason's ear and stirs up even more hate against him by posting a number of phone conversations he had with The Piss Lord, wherein he calls his own fans "idiots" and "dumbos." After Annoying Biker offers to send him a free car, Genova offers to sell Annoying Biker Rich Piana's phone number, but he'll need to send him cash on top of the car. Genova demands expensive gifts from his fans in exchange for shoutouts, as if shoutouts are the most valuable commodity in the world. He scoffs at gifts of 15 buck that he receives from fans as not being good enough. This outrageous display of greed brings unprecedented levels of hate against The Iron Jew, although it sounds like he's desperate to receive expensive gifts mostly so he can shut up Brad. Genova ironically makes an Instagram video later grumbling about having to go out and buy gifts for his family on Black Friday. He probably went to the dollar store and bought some sickening packs of gum and shoelaces. A troll from FitMisc who actually did send Jason a TV (albeit a dated one) in the hopes of gaining his trust to troll him later on shares text conversations with Genova, who claims that he only received the base of the TV. It turns out that Jason's mom, the Television Goblin, stole it because it was sent to her house. Another troll claimed that he was sending Jason a new iPhone, but when he opens the box on camera, it contains a Chap Stick, a Star Wars toothbrush, and a Publix nametag with "Janoy Cresva" on it. (Troll gift unboxing)

-Jason hints at a collaboration with a mystery person. The identity of this person is leaked and it's Rich Piana. However, it either falls through or Genova was delusional about this collab in the first place, and Lord Vader is pissed. In retaliation, he does the unthinkable: he calls an Order 66 on Rich Piana! He quickly deletes the video, but it's reposted, and pisstroopers begin flooding The Piano Man's YouTube comments and Instagram. Slapboxing round 2 might become a reality. (The second Order 66 on Rich Piana)

-Genova posts videos of himself in his car with a baseball bat, saying he's paying Rich Piana a visit at 5% Nutrition in Tampa to get revenge. Only half of his rage against Piana is because of the failed collab -- the other half is because trolls convinced Jason that his imaginary girlfriend, Mary in New York (whom Jason sent a pair of $100 jeans to), is in the Mafia and Rich Piana wants to steal her away from him. Genova now believes that he's a made man in the Mafia and even wears a poverty mobster suit during his car trip. He suddenly has a new fixation on the word "literally," letting everyone know that he's literally on his way to Tampa to literally bitchslap The Piano Man, like literally. Halfway through the trip, he realizes that he doesn't know the address and asks someone to find it for him. He arrives and peers through a few random office windows in Tampa in an effort to find The Piano Man. Genova breaks a couple 5% Nutrition supplement bottles with his little league bat before calling it a day and going home. (Genova hunting down Rich Piana in Tampa)

-For unknown reasons, Genova streams a nude posing session on Instagram, with his lightsaber swinging in full view. Merry merry hoey hoey Christmas, fan buddies. Appropriately, Metallica's "The God That Failed" is heard blaring in the background. Genova later claims that it was Pay For Gay, he was paid $800, and it's no big deal because all bodybuilders do it. After being chewed out by Brad, he promises to increase his naked posing fee to $55,000. (Brad lectures Jason about posing naked on Instagram)

-Genova tops off the Christmas season by getting drunk live on stream. After chugging back a few beers, he declares, "I ain't even feelin fuckin buzzed yet!" Takes one more sip: "I'm feelin fuckin wasted already, man." He once famously claimed that eating vegetables speeds up one's molecular structure, and this is apparently on display when he groans about being hungover already. Viewers who tune in to the stream late and see The Man Getter moaning for his mommy while white liquid drips down his mouth are doubtlessly confused and disturbed. We'll leave it to your imagination as to what happened there. (Genova gets wasted)

-Genova makes another celebrity appearance at the Kavasutra bar, where he attends some kind of Star Wars-themed orgy. We can only assume from his pissening physique that he's playing the role of Jabba the Hutt. He yells, "NATCHA BOY RIC FLAIRENING! WOOOOOO! WOOOOOO! WOOOOOO!" as slave girl Leias make out with each other on a bed. Speaking of which, Genova the Hutt makes a video a week after Carrie Fischer (Princess Leia's actress) died, breaking the news that "Carry fish" is dead. It's assumed that he doesn't really care because she wasn't in his beloved prequel trilogy. Natalie Portman would be a different story. (The Star Wars orgy)

Road to the Ruby 2017 (January 2017 - September 2017)

The Hindenburg in January 2017

-Genova decides that it's time to start training again and announces that he's entering the "Beat PJ" physique transformation contest where contestants can win $5,000 if they make a more impressive improvement than PJ Braun after three months. PJ is even willing to double it to $10,000 for Jason if he wins. This lines up nicely with Jason's plans to enter the CJ Classic bodybuilding show in West Palm Beach on March 11 and the much anticipated Ruby Championships on September 23, where he'll go up against Lenny and Dale. He claims that it will be his final bodybuilding show, after which he'll retire and become a movie star. He starts the new year off with the first good workout video in ages, helped greatly by commentary from Brad the savage. He threatens to knock The Spaniard's teeth through the back of his head if he says "literally" one more time, so we can thank Brad for curing that obnoxious affliction Jason's had since the Rich Piana road trip video. It's painfully apparent during the post-workout posing session that The Hindenburg has an almost insurmountable task ahead of him, having barely touched a weight for half a year, weighing about 220 pounds, and looking like complete shit with pissening orangutan aesthetics. Even his legendary Tom Platz wheels have shrunk down to nothing; training legs twice a year must have finally taken its toll. To silence all the doubters, Jason does a Rocky-inspired stunt where he chugs a glass of raw eggs on camera. It's the first great ment in a long time that manages to endear him to Witnesses, compared to the extreme hate that he constantly received during the Businessman Era. (Jason chugs down some raw eggs)

-Jason does "grueling" Rocky-style training to get in shape, consisting of running along the beach for 30 second Instagram videos. He swears that he will only show pictures updating his physique every two weeks as opposed to every two hours like before. He still continues to drink raw eggs every morning, but PJ Braun forces him to stop. Genova also uploads some appetizing pictures of chicken that's still pink cooked via microwave. No need to be concerned about the Sith Lord; his immune system has become more powerful than you can possibly imagine after years of this revolting shit. He weighs in at 215 pounds after a few weeks of training and dieting. Surprisingly, PJ forces Genova to follow the rules and buy a Blackstone Labs product in order to enter the Beat PJ contest. The Iron Jew immediately asks what the cheapest product is in the whole place, and he buys a Dust V2 pre-workout packet for $2. Dismayed at having to part with $2, The Iron Extortionist offsets it by extorting PJ for $30 in gas money, two bottles of supplements worth about $130, and a gym membership at Busy Body Fitness for a year. (The Iron Extortionist in action again)

-Jason is interviewed on Muscle Sport TV by Gregg Valentino, the famous "Man Whose Arms Exploded" because he injected so much synthol into his biceps. Genova gives an incredibly delusional interview, once again claiming that he's going to be starring in a movie and has to spend 6 months in acting school because he's going to have a scene with Brad Pitt and Natalie Portman. Maybe the story is about Natalie Portman stuck in a love triangle where she has to choose between two of Hollywood's hottest hunks. The Mellon Dollar Man also claims that he's making $1 per view on YouTube and gets 10 million views per month. Gregg and his co-host Joe Pietaro don't really react to this and troll him like Lee Priest would, so either they're being nice or they're unable to do math. (Muscle Sport TV interview with Jason Genova)

-There's not much visible progress in Jason's update pics. His body looks more like a deflating balloon than actually getting in shape. Nevertheless, there's no indication that he's dropping out of the March CJ Classic show and even claims that girls are coming up and hitting on him now that he's so ripped. He heads to the chiropractor who confirms that Jason has scoliosis. Blackstone Labs also hooks Jason up with a workout with IFBB pro Cody Montgomery, or Cody Montgomfery as Jason calls him. In light of everyone Genova touches turning to piss, Montgomfery begs Jason not to Order 66 him. Genova asks Nate if he can give him a spare drone lying around as a birthday present, he's entitled to it (Nate's drones cost over $1,000 each).

-Genova's bodybuilding show entry fee being paid for is endangered after Blackstone Labs is raided by the FDA for DMAA, a questionably legal ingredient in their pre-workout Dust Extreme. On top of that, PJ and his wife Celeste divorce after rumours of her cheating on him, and the two fight over the Celestial Bodiez website (a clothing company that she ran out of the Blackstone Labs warehouse. PJ was so pissed that he actually locked her out of the building). Perhaps the Piss Lord is all that Pajamas will have left after his empire crumbles around him. Genova is down to 204 pounds two weeks out from his show. He complains about being carb depleted in a SnapChat video that's suspiciously recorded in the Dunkin Donuts parking lot. (Jason totally not crabbing up on Dunkin Donuts)

-Genova seems to be aware that he's not in any shape to compete in the show but says that he's forced to anyway in order to be in Muscle and Sport Magazine. Even Lenny, who is normally supportive of Jason, wants him to call it off. In a last ditch effort to not embarrass himself on stage, Genova tries some ridiculous broscience one week out where he puts Preparation H hemorrhoid cream on his gut and shrink wraps it to flush out all the water and sodium. (Andrew speechless after discovering Jason's shrink-wrapped stomach)

-Genova's Hyundai breaks down because he ignored the check engine light for years and never changed the oil, but not even this mishap can stop him from going over to the CJ classic and making an ass of himself, getting his grandma to drive him. Andrew says that he refuses to film Jason at the show because he looks like shit, so Jason gets Nate to do it instead. Jason's fat ass is rolled onto the stage, and his flab jiggles along to the posing music. He competes against five people and gets last place. He attempts to lie to Andrew and Brad that he got 4th place for some reason, despite knowing that Nate was there filming the whole thing. (Jason's embarrassing showing at the CJ Classic)

-Jason tells PJ Braun that his failure at the CJ Classic was actually him being paid $500 to come down and guest pose. He also claims that Muscle and Sport Magazine is letting him write an article, even though Janoy Cresva can't even spell his own name. PJ feels bad for him having his car break down and offers him a Nissan Juke if he successfully learns how to drive a manual transmission. It's unclear if Pajamas means that Jason can merely borrow the car if he succeeds, or if he can actually HAVE it. It turns out to be moot anyway since he doesn't even come close to learning, ignoring PJ's orders to stay in the Blackstone Labs parking lot and stalling the car on the road in the middle of rush hour. (PJ Braun tries to teach Jason Genova how to drive stick shift)

-Witnesses discover that Genova is suddenly in Los Angeles with his sugar daddy Jonny Fitness. It's surreal to see Jason outside of Florida for the first time since he's debuted on YouTube. He's staying in a penthouse suite and claims that he's having important meetings with people about his acting career and clothing company. The trip does little to ingratiate Jonny to Witnesses since there are very few ments out of the whole expensive affair, and potato Jonny (or Jason) leaves a giant "FILMORA free trial" watermark in the middle of all the videos. Jason mostly just walks down the streets of LA while endlessly repeating, "Down here in LA, it's sick, it's piss, it's revolting, it's insulting." A random woman on the street recognizes Genova and berates him for failing to give her a birthday shoutout a year ago. Genova brags to taxi drivers that he's making A LOTTT of money on YouTube; curiously enough however, the Mellon Dollar Man begs Jonny for help in paying his phone bill. He also asks Jonny to buy him food at In-N-Out Burger, orders two "McDoubles" there, then pockets Jonny's change. (Jason at In-N-Out Burger in LA)

-Genova makes up with Jonas for the fourth time, and they announce My Story Part 9, which Jason says is "the last part of the trilogy." A number of bizarre claims are made, like Joey Joe Joe not being present anymore because he's actually a female to male transsexual and is having a baby. Jonas admits that Attorney Scott Miller is homeless and it's hard to get him in a video because they have to wander the streets looking for him. (My Story Part 9 announcement)

-Jason's car is still broken down and he's slowly turning into Lenny now that he has to ride his bike everywhere. Jason oddly passes on an invitation to drive a Lamborghini with PJ Braun so he can hang out with a fan of his instead: a genetic abomination whom Witnesses dub "Half Brother Dan," joking that he's Genova's long lost half brother that he left stranded at the airport.

-Jason asks PJ Braun to give him a job at Blackstone Labs "with the least amount of work" because Publix is treating him "like an Egyptian slave." He calls an Order 66 on PJ's ex-wife Celeste, and it's rather effective since she's taken over ownership of Celestial Bodiez and it doesn't help to have their new Instagram and YouTube channel flooded with dislikes and "ORDER 66 CELESTE BONIN FOR BEYARING BOTHER PJ" comments. Their Q&A livestreams are a disaster, with pisstroopers taking over and telling Celeste that she met their half brother Dan at the airport. Many people suspect that PJ told Lord Vader to do it in order to sabotage Celestial Bodiez now that Blackstone Labs is coming out with their own line of women's clothing.
Jonas claims he saw the check that PJ wrote Jason to do it. PJ wanted revenge because he had agreed to give up ownership of Celestial Bodiez to Celeste in the divorce, along with cars and residences, just so he could get his damn dog back. Hey, if PJ is going to give Jason gas money and hundreds of dollars worth of supplements every month, he may as well get his money's worth. (Blackstone Labs ments with Jason Genova and the Delray Misfits)

-Genova bloats back up to over 200 pounds, blowing any chance of winning the Beat PJ contest, even though he probably would have received special favour if he had at least put in a modicum of effort. He's making terrible videos where he endlessly repeats his "it's sick, it's piss, it's revolting, it's insulting" mantra, along with out of control bragging about his imaginary money and delusional movie career. It's an unpleasant reminder of the excesses of the Businessman Era. Jason even attempts to start a GoFundMe to get him a new car, inspired by Witnesses donating over $1,000 to clean out Lenny's house, but nobody donates. The dislikes on his videos have reached an all time high, and his comments section is a cesspool of extreme hate and negativity where everybody calls him a fat greedy retard who should go kill himself. Jason's channel had been slowly but steadily growing ever since his debut on YouTube in 2009, with occasional spikes after major ments like the Rich Piana slapboxing incident. Jason had still been riding the wave of new subscribers and interest that he got from the slapboxing video to some extent, but he totally squandered the opportunity, and for the first time ever he is now losing hundreds of subscribers.

-Brad has a long talk with Genova in the car concerning his crumbling YouTube channel, telling him that he needs to stop with the lying, bragging, and to quit repeating his annoying mantra constantly. Genova sounds unusually coherent and normal (in stark contrast to another manic video where he was clearly off his meds, riding his bike while yelling at traffic, "MACHO MAN RICK SAVAGE! SNAP INTO A SLIM JIM OHHH YEAH!" and giving passing cars the finger), and seems to understand that he needs to redeem himself after his poor showing at the CJ Classic, the Beat PJ contest, and the trip to LA. Jason later makes a video promising to be a humble human bean from now on, with no more lying, and he will no longer say his annoying mantra. It's the first video in months that gets more likes than dislikes. The Spaniard declares that if you win the crowd, you win your freedom baby. (Jason Genova, the humble human bean)

-Jason doesn't keep his promise to stop saying his mantra entirely, but he does cut it down significantly. He's even beginning to edit his own videos, as evidenced by him looping clips of the same footage multiple times in the same video. He has relapses of being a lying, greedy braggart -- for example, announcing that My Story Part 9 will cost $2.99 to view on YouTube, and pretending that Half Brother Dan's Mustang is his: when Jason is driving it and Dan tells him that he can be seen in the reflection of Jason's sunglasses, Jason says not to worry because he'll edit it out later, but he obviously forgot to. (Genova drives Half Brother Dan's Mustang)

-Jason gets an Acura TL handed down to him from his mother. Oddly enough, she had it tricked out with ghetto chrome rims. The Man Getter announces a contest where 4-7 winners, 10 winners, 1 lucky winner wins a trip to Florida to eat with, train with, AND SLEEP WITH The Piss Lord. (The most lucrative contest in history)

-My Story Part 9 is a critical and box office flop, making a grand total of $30, and surprise surprise Jason and Jonas have yet another falling out over it. Half Brother Dan was involved in its production, and he was expecting a big payday out of it to pay off $5,000 in credit card debt he racked up on his parents' credit card. In a phone call with a FitMiscer, Jonas says that Jason is frustrating to work with because he can't focus or follow directions to shoot scenes. This bodes ill for his aspiring Hollywood movie career. Jonas confirms that Jane confiscates all of Jason's money, his income from both Publix and YouTube, altogether totalling about $1,000 a month because she's his legal guardian and gives him a weekly allowance of $70, paying all his bills in return. This may help explain why he's such a freeloader and always begs people for money. Jonas wants to fight Jason, Andrew, or Brad in a boxing match (????????). A lot of what Jonas says in the phone call is probably true, but he can't be trusted since he's a bit of a delusional potato himself, claiming that he could beat Jason in a fight because he's only half an inch shorter, even though Jason clearly has 4-5 inches on him and probably outweighs him by 100 pounds, too. Jonas criticizes Andrew for making about $1,000 a month from the Delray Misfits channel but taking it all for himself, never paying any of his big draws like Big Lenny. Jonas claims to be friends with Big Lenny, and this might actually be true since he once posted a video where he was with him. Jonas expresses a desire to steal Lenny away from the Misfits and centre his videos around him and Attorney Scott Miller instead of Jason. (Phone call with Jonas)

-Jason does a workout with IFBB pro figure model and Blackstone Labs athlete Karen Yoakum. Karen asks if she can be Jason's official prep coach for the Ruby -- she's not quite as jacked as Coath Debbie, but he excitedly accepts her offer. He tries to get her to come over to his condo, claiming that she needs to check his diet (yeah right, he wants to get her on the Brass Bed of Doom). She takes him through a cardio-intensive workout reminiscent of the Adam Era, including the dreaded burpees. Even the long lost Claw is making its return. She initially tries calling herself Coach Karen instead of Coath Karen, clearly demonstrating that she does not understand what she is in for ... (Workout with Coath K)

-Genova no-shows another scheduled session with Coath Karen, claiming car problems. However, these supposed car problems don't stop him from training with another IFBB pro, Shane Eslahi, and NPC competitor, Tristan James, shortly after. Perhaps The Man Getter simply prefers sausage. In any case, he's getting some good workouts in, and his gut is slowly starting to not hang over his shorts anymore. (Genova stands up Coath K)

-A guy named Jonny Bravo (not to be confused with Jonny Fitness) comes down to film a Jason Genova documentary, but unlike the last documentary, this one actually gets made. It's called "My Biggest Struggle" (wasn't that the name of Hitler's book?) and is highly professional but corny, with Jason regaling us with his experience of being bullied in high school: "Gimme your lunch money or I'll give you a wedgie!" He also admits that he "was born with slight, slight, you can't even see it, I don't even think it's like, 1% of autism." This shows a change in the way that he wants to present himself: In times past, he wanted people to think that he was perfectly fine other than a few minor disabilities like ADD, OCD, Run DMC, and dyslexia, but now he wants to be seen as somebody who has heroically overcome his crippling disabilities to become a successful YouTube celery, and all of his bad behavior can be blamed on his disabilities. The Muscle Sport Magazine article that he claimed to be writing also turns out to be real (though obviously it was heavily edited by somebody who is actually literate), and it presents a similar narrative. (My Biggest Struggle short film)

-Lord Vader calls an Order 66 on Kali Muscle in order to help out Jonny Bravo who is currently feuding with him. Kali retaliates by calling all of Genova's fans retards because they follow a retard. This doesn't go over well with the pisstroopers since they feel like they're the only ones who are allowed to call Jason retarded. Kali also makes some connection between the number 66 and 666, calling all of the pisstroopers devil worshipers. Despite Kali Muscle having over a million subscribers vs Genova's 40,000, pisstroopers completely take over the comments section of his YouTube videos, enraging Kali and prompting him to make several response videos. He even reads the absurd comments on his channel word for word: "To end your Order 66 nightmare, you must read book and journey to the Jedi temple. When you get there, purify yourself in the warm piss waters of Lake Cresva, and swim with the ancient dolphins from the 70's. It less stress." While the pisstroopers are dying on the battlefield for him, Genova blissfully vlogs himself going to see Wonder Woman and going shopping with his mother. (The mobilization call for the pisstroopers)

-The Order 66 against Kali Muscle is the biggest one in a long time and continues to rage on. Lord Vader finally appears again and offers the pisstroopers some support, repeatedly asking Marc Lobsterliner and Mac Trucc, "WHAT'S YOUR MOTIVE?" when they try to interfere with his Order 66 against Kali, telling them to mind their own biznizz or they'll be next. Even Big Lenny joins the attack, calling Kali a "porch monkey" and going on a rant about how it's too bad that Hitler never created his 1,000 year Reich. It's unclear if Lenny is genuinely racist or if he's just hamming it up for the camera, but it should be noted that he was once married to a Haitian woman. Plus he fucks black trannies on a regular basis. Jay Masters later chimes in, claiming to have powerful friends in California who will lock up Kali again if he doesn't apologize. Unexpectedly, Dale Chance gets pissed off at Jason and Lenny because he's a big fan of Kali Muscle, adding some bad blood to their upcoming showdown at the Ruby. The traitorous Jonas the Rat Prick is also spotted on Instagram trying to talk to Kali Muscle and offering him damning information about Jason, but how do you dig up dirt on somebody who already has a video of himself jacking off? Come to think of it, Kali "Chuck Basher" Muscle does too. (Big Lenny calls out Kali Muscle)

-Genova hooks up with yet another Blackstone Labs chick, Diana Maybrook, an aspiring fitness model who seems to be taking the role of life coath while leaving the gym coathing to Karen, Cody, Tristan, and Shane. Jason and Diana make a video addressing the haters, and Jason boasts about hanging out with hot fitness chicks like her all the time. She calls him a "marketing god" even though he's currently in the process of posting 10 shit videos per day with 90% dislikes where he mindlessly repeats his catchphrases and is losing more subscribers than he ever has before. He's in dire need of another intervention from Brad and Andrew, but they've been on vacation for a while. Genova uses the movie Saving Private Ryan as proof that it's illegal to send an only child to war and that's the reason why he wasn't allowed to join the military. He says that they wouldn't send him into battle anyway because he's too valuable to be blown up. (Jason and Diana address the haters)

-In the sea of Genova's awful vlog videos which are all the same and have zero ments, he does post one amusing video where he weighs out all of his food, fries an egg, then plops it directly on the scale. He gets another workout in with Tristan, who rebukes Genova for dumping a gallon of olive oil in all his meals. Genova denies eating any cheat meals and claims that he's eating "distilled oatmeal." (Jason's workout with Tristan)

-The Delray Playboy goes out for a night on the town with Diana but gets friendzoned by her on camera, as she brutally shuts him down every time he tries hitting on her or putting his arm around her, and she even says the dreaded "Jason is my bestie" and "Jason is like my brother" lines. (Jason and Diana go out)

-Marc Lobliner said that he was flying Genova out to Ohio to be at a charity event for veterans, but he cancels his offer to pay for Genova's flight and hotel because he called an Order 66 on Alan Roberts from Every Damn Day Fitness in order to help out Jonny Bravo, calling Alan an "ugly old fat man, and his wife's an ugly old fat bitch." Genova says that Lobsterliner would be nowhere if it weren't for him. This might be true for someone like Nate, but for Lobsterliner, highly dubious. Lobster Prick clarifies that Genova is still invited to come to the event, he just won't pay for his ticket, but little does he know that not paying for The Iron Jew's flight and hotel is as good as uninviting him. (Genova and Lenny call out Lobster Prick for not paying for Genova's trip)

-Jay Masters convinces Genova to enter the 170 pounds middleweight class at the Ruby so he doesn't have to go up against guys in light heavyweight who are way bigger than him, like in past shows. The Misfits are actually complimenting Jason's progress in a non-sarcastic way; he's clearly lost a ton of weight, cutting down to 190 pounds but is in danger of looking like an Ethiopian crackhead who's lean but has little muscle. He writes on Instagram that his "jewline" is starting to come in. Amusingly enough, Jason is actually leaner now than PJ Braun who has gone full Hindenburg and is now sporting a double chin after hitting the bottle, dealing with the stress of his divorce and the various troubles with his company. Lenny is looking terrible; say what you want about his gut (which is unfixable at this point), but he always managed to shred down for bodybuilding shows to the point where he was vascular and had striated glutes. Now though, he's actually in worse shape than he was a couple months ago, and Witnesses all fear for his health. Dale, on the other hand, is rumoured to be looking great, but Andrew and Brad are keeping his pictures a secret. (Genova looking like an Ethiopian crackhead)

-Genova does a back workout earlier in the day before he's supposed to do a scheduled back workout with Cody Montgomfery. Piss. He's skipped out on several training sessions with Coath Karen, and she suspects that he's been avoiding her because he can't handle her conditioning workouts. He claims that his car broke down yet again and even cries/pretends to cry on Instagram Live over it, but it turns out that he's telling the truth when PJ phones Jane. Finally, Genova gets another session in with Karen, and he looks to have bloated up since his last workout with the Misfits, probably getting cocky after receiving compliments on the amount of weight he's lost and felt entitled to a little treat (don't be mad Skip). He modified Coath Karen's diet because he thinks he knows better, but he agrees to follow the original diet. (Karen trains Jason again)

-Genova is weighing in at 196 pounds, and his body fat is at 17.2% according to a DEXA scan. PJ Braun seems committed to getting the Piss Lord shredded so PJ can surpass his nemesis Adam Harper, hence sending three coaths to harass Jason. Chef Crackhead lures Diana into his condo to cook some salmon with him while he's wearing nothing but his underwear.  Despite being dressed for seduction, the friendzoning continues as he's forced to refer to her as his "sister," but he still zooms in on his sister's tits throughout the whole video. At one point, it sounds like he lets a fart rip right in front of her. He expresses confusion as to why he's still single, since he's "a good looking guy with a great body." They end up burning the salmon, so they abort the stove top cooking and finish it off in the microwave. (Cooking salmon with sexy sis Diana. Unfortunately a re-upload of the deleted video, so it's missing the original comments)

-After Witnesses get fed up with Genova's constant Nature Boy Ric Flairening WOOOOO high profilin strofilin impersonations, Genova decides to try a new one: he does an unusually good Elvis Presley impersonation, and it seems eerily similar to an Andy Kaufman bit where he would successfully troll audiences for years by pretending to be an awful, clueless comedian before blowing them away with a perfect Elvis impersonation. Really makes you think ... (Elvis video)

-Genova streams an Instagram Live session while driving, and viewers claim that he got into a car accident because he was distracted with reading the comments on his phone. However, no one managed to save the stream of the actual collision, and Jason claims that he walked out of his condo and saw that his back bumper was dented because a hater troll smashed it with a baseball bat. Whatever happened, Jane the Gains Goblin is not pleased and takes away his driving privileges, though Jason claims that he's choosing not to drive because he's crab depleted and can't be on the road. (The alleged bumper smashing)

-Jason pays Blackstone Labs a visit, raving like a madman and begging PJ for money not even a week after he promised not to again. He claims that he needs it for something to ensure that he'll look the best he's ever looked at the Ruby; the implication is that he needs it to buy a bunch of steroids from Lenny and even shows PJ a text message quoting the price, but the Iron Reverse Fake Natty might just use the money to buy more bling bling and Burger King for all we know. This picture pretty much sums up how PJ feels every time The Iron Freeloader shows up to Blackstone Labs, and PJ has to deal with his delusions and rambling. Pajamas confirms that Blackstone Labs is taking Jason to Mr. Olympia in Las Vegas in September, which is a week before the Ruby. The Mother is allowing it on the condition that she tag along. (The Sith Lord invades Blackstone Labs)

-In another session with Coath Karen, Genova is surprisingly self aware of his weaknesses, noting his flat biceps and lack of shoulders despite looking the best he's looked in a long time. It's puzzling that he's self critical now, and when he's a fat slob Hindenburg, he's suddenly "got that Craig Titus look. Huge and fuckin freaky!" PJ offers to buy Jason a Ferrari in the unlikely event that he wins the Ruby and if there's a minimum of 6 other competitors in his class, but for some reason, Jason seems more interested in getting a Rolex watch than a Ferarri. Maybe because it's manual transmission? (Another session with Coath Karen)

-Jason's adonis belt is starting to come in and he's sporting some major vascularity. Maybe Lenny really did hook him up with loads of skittles. The only thing stopping Jason from matching his peak in the Adam Era is that his stomach still has a bit of a "deflated balloon" look to it, depending on the day and lighting, but he already looks better than he did at the 2015 Ruby. Still seven weeks to go until the Ruby 2017, plenty of time to screw it all up. (Jason's current condition)

-Nate's channel has exploded in popularity with 240,000 subscribers, and there's some weird tension between him and Jason in a Blackstone Labs video after the two had not done a video together in a long time. Jason later calls an Order 66 on Nate after someone showed Jason a supposed text conversation with Nate where he said that he doesn't want to hang out with Jason anymore because he has a girlfriend now and wants his channel to go mainstream. After Jason finds out that the text message was fake, he apologizes to Nate, accepts his own apology, and cancels the Order 66, but many pisstroopers refuse to stand down; in fact, most knew right from the beginning that it was fake but felt like an Order 66 on Nate was a long time coming because he's the ultimate cookie cutter and they feel like he used Jason and the Misfits to get his channel off the ground. (Apology video)

-Tired of being relegated to the friendzone, The Delray Playboy insinuates that he's banging his bestie sister Diana in an interview with Muscle Sport TV. Although he doesn't explicitly name her, it's pretty obvious whom he's referring to by process of elimination. Diana is understandably outraged but makes an over-dramatic video where she insults all of Jason's fans and calls Jason a liar, even though nobody believed that they banged in the first place. Jason making up lies about people is just standard procedure, but she doesn't get that it's no big deal because nobody believes a word that he says. She says that she'd never let Genova get intimate with her and even says she can "prove" that she never had sex with him. What is she going to do, have her period on camera? She repeatedly tells everybody how MATURE and INTELLIGENT she is, basically admits that she was just using Genova for exposure, and that her real goal is to gain a following by sharing her vast knowledge and experience with people despite being a 20 year old bimbo with fake tits. Genova later apologizes to her, but her stuck up attitude in the response video rubbed pisstroopers the wrong way, and they invade her social media, unprompted by Lord Vader. She deletes her Twitter and disables likes/dislikes and comments on her YouTube. (Diana's response)

-Diana clearly had no idea what she was getting herself into before deciding to enter the Genovaverse. This is typical of people who hear about Genova and his large following, but they don't do their research first, brushing off warnings not to get involved with him and be infected by the piss. They initially think that they can handle the trolling, but then when they actually experience it they're like, "Oh fuck." Diana runs crying to Marc Lobliner asking for help in dealing with the pisstroopers since he's been a victim of them himself. Lobsterliner white knights Diana by calling out Genova for Order 66ing Diana, even though he didn't actually do it and the pisstroopers acted on their own. Lobster Prick then tries snitching on all the pisstroopers who harassed Diana on her social media by posting up their profiles and contacting organizations that they belong to. He pathetically tries to call his own Order 66 on Genova as if he has any power at all to do this. Lord Vader retaliates by calling a real Order 66 on Pocketliner, and he quickly deletes his white knighting video. Diana is on her own now and will probably spend the next decade trying to dispell Genova's Curse. (Lobster Prick tries white knighting Diana)

-Speaking of Genova's Curse, another major scandal hits after Rich Piana falls into a coma for over a week: a troll convinces Jason that Piana died, so Jason falsely reports the news in a video that Piana is dead, but he also adds that Piana deserved it because he didn't collab with him. This causes a far greater backlash than the time Jason laughed at Greg Plitt's death because The Piano Man is the most beloved meme in all of YouTube fitness. Genova gives another Academy Award winning performance when he cries in the car over it with Jonny Bravo. Jason later claims that the reason why he said Piana deserved to die is because he was hopped up on supplements and out of his mind. PJ Braun now has a public relations disaster to deal with, because he promised to take Genova with him to the Olympia as part of Blackstone Labs, and he says that he might have to punish Genova by not taking him now. (Rich Piana get what deserve)

-Rich Piana finally passes away for real after being in a coma for two weeks, so now Genova really looks like an asshole. In addition to that, the traitor Jonas the Rat Prick, still holding a grudge from the time PJ ordered Jason to dump Jonas over My Story Part 7 and always eager to sabotage the relationship between the two, stokes the flames by leaking a video that he secretly recorded of Jason saying that PJ Braun cheated on his ex-wife by doing Gay For Pay. We've claimed that "the hate for Jason is at an all time high" multiple times in these cliff notes but he truly does exceed the previous level of hate each time, and this is no exception. As a result, Blackstone Labs issues an official statement that they have severed all ties with Genova and will no longer coath him, provide supplements to him, or do videos with him. This is a potential disaster for Genova's contest prep. He recently had his body fat tested at 11% according to a DEXA scan and was well on his way to coming into the Ruby in his best ever shape. Now that he's been abandoned by all of his Blackstone Labs coaths, there's no evidence that he's even touched a weight since the session with Coath Karen over a week ago and he's clearly turned to comfort eating; he's looking noticeably worse than he was a month ago. The chances of him looking decent for the Ruby are grim, and at this point, he is so despised that he'll probably be booed off the stage. Saying that The Piano Man deserved to die for not collabing with him was the biggest mistake of Genova's YouTube career.

-Jonny Bravo visits Jason's condo while filming a new Delray Misfits documentary which he claims has interest from a major network, and it's discovered that Jason's revolting shaker cup has maggots in it. This brings to mind an old video where Nate visited Jason's condo and The Piss Lord assured him, "I have clean cups. I washed them. You can trust me." (The maggots video)

-Jonny Bravo and Diana stream an Instagram Live session where they openly mock Genova and ponder over whether Jonny would fuck Jason in the ass for a million dollars. The very mature and intelligent Diana thinks that no one will record the video because it's "encrypted and copyrighted by Diana Maybrook and you're not allowed to use it." Diana is also spotted thanking PJ Braun on the Blackstone Labs Instagram post that announces the firing of Jason Genova. It's possible that she's so full of herself that she thinks Jason implying that he banged her was the reason why he was fired. The beginning of the infamous oatmeal burning video from 2011 contained this text: "The bodybuilding community has turned against me." --AKA The Man Motion. The quote was funny at the time because it was so absurd; how was the bodybuilding community supposed to turn against Genova when he was some obscure mentally impaired nobody? However, it proved to be prophetic and certainly does apply now. Nate clearly wanted to rid himself of Jason long ago but feared reprisal from the pisstroopers, but now that everyone is on the Jason hate train and it's socially acceptable to dump him, he's ignoring all his phone calls. Jason streams himself watching the Floyd Mayweather Jr. vs Conor McGregor fight in a bar with his mother, which is unusual since he's usually with Andrew and Brad for such an event.
(Diana's copyrighted and encrypted video)

-After it seems like everyone has abandoned the Piss Lord, an unexpected person finally comes to The Man Motion's defense: The Motor City Madman, Jay Masters. He makes a series of Instagram videos going in dry on PJ Braun for dumping Jason yet still keeping Diana. He even sacrifices his own Instagram account by posting a bunch of pictures of PJ's gay for pay spreads, and his account is subsequently banned. There are also rumblings of another Order 66 video being made against Diana by pisstrooper admiral HeridaV, whose Order 66 Jason Bloho video hit 200,000 views and left a trail of destruction in its wake. Blackstone Labs quietly fires Diana. (Jay Masters stands up for the Piss Lord)

-Jason's team of highly trained Blackstone Labs coaths is replaced by his mom. Coath Gains Goblin is obviously not pushing him very hard, and his workouts now consist of lifting weights with so little intensity that he doesn't even break a sweat, with some gentle jogging on the beach afterwards. His mom tries filming one of his posing sessions in his underwear and they get into a heated argument after he calls her an "idiot." One week out from the Ruby, he goes to get another DEXA scan for his body fat and tells the technician, "I'm scared that I've gained muscle." Unsurprisingly, his body fat has increased from 11% a month ago to 14.9%. He makes the excuse that Hurricane Irma screwed up his entire contest prep. So what does that mean, he was forced to subsist on the Burger King that he kept in his freezer for a few days? It also fails to account for the months before that where he got progressively fatter. He weighs 195 pounds with a sizeable gut, and it's no longer possible for him to cut down to middleweight like he planned, but still insists to Andrew that he looks jacked. I got that Chris Farley look. Huge and fuckin freaky! (A chunky Piss Lord insists he can still diet down and look respectable in less than a week)

-Jason decides to start bulking a few days before the Ruby (now dubbed "The Special Olympia") and fattens up to over 200 pounds on the day of the show. He's now in the heavyweight class with Dale, so not only did he fail to make middleweight, but now he's even too fat for light heavyweight. Lenny was hospitalized for a week with atrial fibrillation so at least he has a good excuse for looking like shit, unlike Genova. Jason's already back in Hindenburg mode, helping himself to all the slop before the night show even begins. Lenny says that he gave Jason liquid Cialis before the show so he has a raging boner, intensified I'm sure by him and Lenny oiling each other up backstage (less stress). Jason wore the classic PJ Braun red posing trunks for the morning judging but debuts some new golden posing trunks for the night show, presumably to help the ever-present piss stains to blend in. Just like the previous Ruby, he rushes through his whole routine and repeats his most muscular pose ("most autistic" is more like it) every 10 seconds. Hilariously, Jason is booted to the novice class, which only has one other guy, and Lenny also has one opponent in the super heavyweight category, so both Jason and Lenny get 2nd place trophies, with Dale getting 3rd place in his class despite looking the best by far out of the three competing Misfits. Once again, the Jason Genova adages of, "Sometimes nobody shows up and you automatically win," and, "It politics bro" are proven. (Backstage at the Ruby) | (Night show posing)

The Video Gamer and Hollywood Actor Era That Never Was (October 2017 - November 2018)

Jason Genova hard at work in LA Fitness doing his brutal dungeon slayer workout for his next bodybuilding show

-Genova says he's now done with competing. An hour later, he says he's doing one last show in November. Piss. There's no real content on his channel anymore, just shitty 10 minute livestreams where he stares into his phone silently for minutes at a time as he ignores the flood of negative comments, then finds the 1 comment in 50 that praises him (probably sarcastically) and replies, "Thanks brotha". He also has a tendency to say, "Give you a shoutout? Sure brotha," without even bothering to say the person's name. Pig Pen's spray tan still remains for several days after the Ruby Championships. At this rate, he won't even have to get a new coat of tan for his show next month. He helps make a video on his mother's cooking channel and whispers to her (not quite quietly enough) to run the video up to 10 minutes so they can get more ad money, it Jewening. He starts whining when she ends the video a couple minutes before the 10 minute mark. (Running up that ad money)

-Jason cancels the bodybuilding show and announces that he's going to be a professional gamer now on, despite never having mentioned video games before in his whole life. Some potato sends him a free Playstation 4 and a new desktop computer for gaming then helps him set up and moderate his channel. It becomes apparent that the sponsor wants to try piggybacking off Jason's popularity to collect donations and direct people to his own poverty videos which have 11 views each. Jason seems to think that it's some kind of gay for pay cam show, listing prices for a shoutout, shoutout + dance, and shoutout + posing in speedos. The video games are completely incomprehensible to Pudding Head, running his character around in circles, and he's unable to even complete the tutorial in Grand Theft Auto V. His gaming career ends after one night when he's banned for posing in his speedos live on stream. Strong waste of $2,000+ by the sponsor. (G4P on courtesy of Mr. No Homo)

-Jason attempts to game some more but quickly loses interest when the donations don't roll in like he was expecting them to, because he's not a hot chick showing her tits on stream while playing League of Legends in Silver League. The Spaniard announces that he's going to try out for the WWE instead. He can't even win one match in WWE 2K17 on easy mode, how is he supposed to beat Brock Lesnar IRL? (Jason Genova's aspiring new career)

-Delray Misfit Emma overdoses on heroin according to her family. She's in the hospital for kidney failure and the circulation to her legs being cut off. She denies using heroin and claims that she just accidentally fell asleep on her legs. Her family starts a fundraising campaign which raises over $4,000, many of the donations coming from Genova's Witnesses. However, the relationship between Jason Genova and the Misfits deteriorates further after Emma makes a video accusing Jason of asking people to donate money to him so that he could pass it off to Emma, but he just kept it instead. Fellow junkie Nate also takes her word for it and throws Jason under the bus, using this as an excuse for why he no longer hangs out with him (he's always looking desperately for justification to distance himself from Jason so he can go full cookie cutter with the popularity of his channel). It appears that the two potatoes, Emma and Nate, failed to do any fact checking first before raising such a serious accusation against Jason: the sole evidence that Emma had was a few trolls messaging her and telling her that Jason was asking for money on her behalf. However, Jason had actually made a video earlier encouraging people to go to Emma's own fundraising campaign and donate to her. Genova's reputation for past scummy behaviour is such that people are eager to pounce on any allegation, no matter how little evidence there is, of him being a scumbag. This is like the story of the boy who cried wolf, except in this case it's the boy who cried, "How bout 15 buck PayPal, I'm entitled to it." (Nate's video)

-On the Delray Misfits podcast, Andrew essentially absolves Jason of wrongdoing after secretly examining his private messages on Instagram and Facebook as well as PayPal receipts in his e-mail and did not find a single piece of evidence that people donated him money to pass off to Emma. On the same podcast, Lenny convinces Jason to do the Dayana Cadeau show with him in October, which is much bigger than the Ruby. It sounds like we could be entering the Coath Lenny era as he encourages Jason to go full Hindenburg, train with him, and then start dieting in June. It's desperately needed and the only possible thing that could save The Ment at this point. Lenny warns Jason that if he fails to get shredded, he's going to shove pills down his throat and not tell him what they are. (Podcast addressing the allegations against Jason)

-At long last, for the first time since the break-up after the Rich Piana death incident, Jason barges into the Blackstone Labs office and reunites with PJ Braun, claiming that he misses his brother. Jason asks PJ if he saw his apology video. PJ says he has a lot of apology videos. Jason clarifies, "The sincere one." He still insists that he's moving to LA in the summer to pursue his acting career and that his bodybuilding show at the Dayana Cadeau will be a 1980 Arnold-esque comeback at Mr. Olympia. PJ tells Jason that most of his employees are mad at Jason and he's going to need to do a lot of work to win them back. Jason asks PJ if he's entitled to a little Christmas present, and PJ asks him what he wants. Jason had been gushing over "PeeJay" so much that we were half expecting him to say, "All I want for Christmas ... is you." Of course, The Iron Extortionist had other ideas and asks for a drone. PJ refuses to buy Jason an expensive DJI drone but gives him $100 to buy a cheap one he saw at Wal-Mart. He takes the cash and skedaddles outta there. PJ reveals that the whole thing was a test to see if Jason sincerely missed him or if he just wanted money again. PJ pretended to be annoyed in the video, but you can tell that he was enjoying The Ment and missed Lord Pissious raising havoc around the office.
Genova could prove useful for Blackstone Labs, with the views of Blackstone Labs' YouTube channel taking a nosedive since his departure. (Genova reunites with bother PeeJay)

-Pajamas runs his Beat PJ transformation contest again with a $10,001 prize (the extra $1 is solely so he can one-up his nemesis Aaron Singerman's $10,000 transformation contest with RedCon1). PJ actually writes into the official rules that "Jason Genova cannot enter unless he also shows a proof of purchase for a quality drone." Genova initially tries sending PJ a picture of the drone as proof that he bought it, and it turns out that he got it straight off Google Images. The Iron Extortionist actually apologizes to PJ for not asking for $500 instead of $100 during his last visit so he could buy a nicer DJI drone that costs a thousand buck. The Iron Jew attempts to negotiate a "deal" with PJ that if he sends Jason $500-$1,000, he'll buy the drone and count it as his entitled birthday gift. Lord Vader's Jedi mind tricks don't work on PJ for once, and he refuses to send him any more money. (The drone scandal)

-Jason really does buy a DJI Phantom 3 drone. The drone saga comes to an anti-climactic (albeit predictable) end after he apparently crashes it by flying it into himself, with the propeller slicing up his arm. (Jason admits how he sliced up his arm)

-Another random stranger decides to interject himself into the Genovaverse without doing any research first on Genova's Curse: "Big Rob" announces that he's Jason's new manager. He's made videos in the past portraying himself as helping out mentally retarded kids and must think that Genova is one too. He talks to him like he's 12 years old and makes weird cringey videos where he dresses up like a superhero and has phone conversations with the president. Witnesses detect creepy Jerry Sandusky pedo vibes from him; one day somebody is going to walk into the showers of LA Fitness and hear rhythmic slapping sounds before discovering Big Rob and Genova in there together with the latter dressed up like a Jedi academy youngling. (Big Rahb being a weirdo)

-Big Rob is influencing Jason heavily with promises that he knows "The Rock Johnson" and can set up a collab video with him. Jason sees Big Rob as his ticket to a Hollywood movie career. Big Rob starts blocking people from Jason's YouTube comments section, claiming that he'll stop all the people from bullying him. Jason has never censored his YouTube comments section before, and this is actually disastrous for his views since his content is unwatchable now, and the only reason why he still gets views is because people enjoy hurling insults at him in the comments. Big Rob also vows to stop everybody who bullies Jason in real life, and this includes the Delray Misfits. Big Rob convinces Jason that the Misfits are vulgar and a bad influence on him, so he needs to drop them so he can team up with him instead and do the promised collab with The Rock Johnson. Big Rob is really shaping up to be the next incarnation of Jonny Fitness.

-An ongoing feud between PJ Braun and Big Jay Masters, dating all the way back to the time Jay went in dry on PJ in response to him firing Genova but keeping Diana Maybrook, finally reaches a boiling point: Genova actually betrays his friend Jay Masters by issuing an Order 66 against him after PJ bribed him with an expensive $300 toy lightsaber. Thus, we had the mind blowing situation where the CEO of a multi million dollar company paid a mentally retarded bag boy to send his Internet legion to harass a fat alcoholic powerlifter who lives in his truck. The Jason Genova Saga is truly one of a kind.
Dale Chance, who recently got a Blackstone Labs sponsorship, also got in a serious car accident, and when people asked PJ during a livestream if he phoned Dale in the hospital and wished him well, PJ said he didn't care and had more important things to worry about than Dale. PJ seemed angry that Dale didn't make as many Instagram posts shilling Blackstone Labs products as he promised. PJ has been acting erratically for a while now and is a bloated mess, clearly hitting the bottle again and probably on drugs, too. It looks like a full blown Blackstone Labs vs Delray Misfits war could break out -- that is, if PJ doesn't check himself in to rehab first. (A drunk/hungover PJ gloats about the Order 66 on Jay Masters)

-Jason, prodded by Big Rob and Jane, severs ties with the Delray Misfits after accusing them of using too much "vulgar language" and hijacking his t-shirt website. There is actually slight slight maybe 1% of truth in this since Andrew made redirect to after Big Rob convinced Jason to make clothing with him instead. Jason also expresses disapproval at Jay Masters' behaviour at the infamous Halloween Party 2016 where he showed up extremely drunk, dressed up like O.J. Simpson, and wielding a large machete (this was clearly The Mother's influence in his big sanctimonious speech). (Jason announces that he has split with the Delray Misfits)

-Big Rob, just like everybody who came before him, finally realizes that he's dunked his head too deep into the warm piss waters of Lake Cresva and announces that he wants nothing to do with Jason anymore. He cracked even faster than usual from the pressure of the trolls and the 3:00 AM phone calls from Genova to call him an Uber. Lord Vader, of course, immediately Order 66s Big Rob after being abandoned, but the Order 66 has lost all of its power since Genova is so despised now. Big Jay Masters actually comes out with a video where he announces that he has overthrown Lord Vader in a coup and is the new issuer of Order 66s. Big Rob quickly realizes that he's receiving a lot of positive feedback for hating on Jason, so he continues to release daily videos where he simultaneously insists that he's over Genova yet still continues to namedrop him in every title and insult him for views.
It becomes apparent that Big Rob was just a retarded attention whore who wanted to use Jason as a way to get people to watch his videos so he could reach 1,000 subscribers while keeping up a "good guy" facade. (Big Rob attempts to escape the Genovaverse)

-Breakups between Jason and the Delray Misfits were a fairly common occurence in the past, but the two parties always just needed a time-out from each other for a while and then things would go back to normal. This time, though, it seems serious, and Andrew and Brad are talking like they've permanently kicked Jason out of the Delray Misfits. They're very upset that The Iron Jew accused them of stealing his t-shirt money when sales simply dried up, and he inferred that they weren't paying him. This is bad for The Ment since Jason can't make funny videos on his own and just keeps mindlessly repeating his catch phrases. Even Misfit Maniacs are expressing dissatisfaction with the Delray Misfits podcast, with each conversation inevitably finding its way back to the subject of black trannies shitting on Lenny's face, which was funny the first 30 times but is getting old now. The Delray Misfits actually manage to get the legendary Coath Adam Harper on the podcast, but since Jason isn't there, it ends up being a total waste. Just like all classic sitcoms that go on for too long, most of the original comedy that made the Jason Genova Saga funny is gone now, and all that's left are tired old catch phrases and special guest appearances. (Adam Harper Podcast)

-After PJ Braun
catches wind from Big Rob that Jason was telling him that PJ used to supply Jason with steroids (it's unknown if this was actually true or just another lie), PJ dumps Jason once again. Jason has burned bridges with everyone he needed to help make menty videos with him: The Delray Misfits, Nate, PJ Braun, Adam, and Jonas. He's desperate and starts up a new prank channel, not realizing that he missed out on the YouTube prank video fad like 3 years ago. His "pranks" consist of him calling up somebody on his contacts list and saying, "This is The Rock Johnson! I'm stuck in the 7-Eleven bathroom with no toilet paper!" And they reply, "... Jason? Is that you? What are you doing?" Meanwhile, the Delray Misfits podcast really scrapes the bottom of the barrel for guests when they bring on Big Rob. He does his usual act of insulting Jason to receive easy praise, and the Misfits buy in. The irony is lost on everyone that Big Rob is the one who killed The Ment by convincing Jason to sever ties with the Delray Misfits, and now Big Rob is in bed with the Misfits, the former foes all united in their hatred of Jason. (Big Rahb podcast)

-A ment firestorm ensues after the legendary and mythical Andrew Collura makes his long-awaited return to Delray Beach to mark the occasion of Christina Broccolini Weekend (declared by Big Lenny to celebrate her birthday). Collura and Lenny actually film a brief posedown video with Genova in the parking lot. Sadly, Andrew and Brad aren't there, meaning that they weren't willing to put aside their petty differences and reunite with The Piss Lord for the momentous occasion of Christina Broccolini Weekend. To top things off, a Big Lenny sex tape comes out the next day where a tranny sits on Lenny's face and pisses in his mouth. Literally pissening. Perhaps the Misfits will take Jason back if he can prove his loyalty and non-cookie cutterness by starring in a tranny sex tape with Lenny, or at the very least putting in an honest day's work doing creampie clean up duty. (The Big Lenny porno. Not safe for work, to say the very least)

-Big Jay Masters threatens to assault Genova for making Andrew Collura and Lenny go rogue and collab with "Lord Retard." Jay Masters' stock is rapidly plummeting among Misfit Maniacs due to him deleting videos on Instagram, blocking people who call him out, and flip-flopping on PJ Braun and Big Rob: first Jay called Big Rob a pedophile and threatened to kill him, then he suddenly decided that he loved Big Rob after he found out that Big Rob disliked Genova. Now, Jay Masters is revealing his envy and insecurity in the face of "King Andrew" Collura's return, the only Misfit who has lifted more weight than him. He challenges Collura to a boxing match but fails to confront him in person, just like he did with PJ Braun. Jay Masters tries to play everything off as trolling, but it strains credulity that he's not genuinely seething from Jason betraying him for the toy lightsaber a couple months ago. Jason is in the gym one day and is warned that Jay Masters will be arriving in less than an hour. Jason skedaddles out of there immediately. (Jay threatens Jason)

-In an attempt to drum up some badly-needed drama for his channel, Jason gets into the most lame feud of all time with a soft Filipino named Average Rich who looks like he barely lifts. Average Rich is supposedly offering to fly Jason down to California to compete against him in a bodybuilding show on July 4th. The trash talk consists entirely of Jason making multiple videos where he says, "AVERAGE RICH, you're goin down, pinworm!" and "I'm gonna creampie you on stage!" (Jason's foe)

-The prodigal son Jason Genova is finally welcomed back by the loving father Andrew on the Delray Misfits podcast. Brad admits that, despite The Shit Lord's irredeemable nature, they've all been together for far too long and there's no escaping the piss at this point. Jason explains how he wants a "cowboy girl from the midwest, Texas, who believes in God and will cook and clean and be my slave." He reveals that his recent conversion to Christianity but still keeping his Jewishness is a way to maximize the amount of gifts he gets. Jason even makes amends with Big Jay Masters, apologizing for Order 66ing him after being bribed by PJ Braun. In turn, Jay apologizes to Jason for saying that he had fetal alcohol syndrome from his mother drinking while pregnant. Jay Masters says that it's nice that they're on good terms now, because, "I'm not someone you want as your enemy." (Reunion podcast)

-Big Rob suffers the worst meltdown in the history of unprepared people entering the Genovaverse after he gets into a feud with his former friend Jonny Bravo, whom he became acquainted with via Genova. Some trolls, including Adam Pollard, convince Big Rob that Jonny Bravo sent the Albanian and Chaldean Mafia after him. Somebody orders a pizza to Big Rob's house, and he pleads with Jonny Bravo to STAHP IT JAAAAAHN, making bizarre claims that the Chaldean Mafia cut the wires to his house and that the FBI are investigating Bravo. Jason calls Big Rob crazy and comments in a video, "He's even worser than me!" (Big Rahb's meltdown)

-In addition to collecting nude pictures of fans, Genova reveals another secret hobby of his: collecting coins. He claims that he got scammed into selling his old coin collection to the Nigerian queen for $100,000, which would have been worth $500,000 today. Perhaps he stared into the abyss for too long and this is the origin story of the Iron Extortionist. His alleged correspondence with the Nigerian queen is certainly dubious, but what isn't in doubt is his Rain Mannening, encyclopedic knowledge of old coins, so he probably did inherit some kind of coin collection from a relative of his and then proceeded to squander it away. He educates fans about coins that "George Washington's wife, Martha Stewart" had. Random lightsaber sounds are edited into the video for some reason. Genova now has a new subject to bore people to death with at the gym, in addition to his YouTube channel views and Star Wars. (Before Jason Genova was The Iron Extortionist, he was The Rain Man of Coins)

-Jason makes a grocery shopping video with his mother set to Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata. Genova's Witnesses are moved to tears by this display of a boy and his Gain Goblin struggling to purchase the very necessities of life at Aldi and its profound commentary on the human condition. Rumour has it that the video is up for a Palme d'or at the Cannes Film Festival. (Video)

-Lou, a wealthy friend of the Delray Misfits who was frequently a guest on the podcast, says he's holding a Memorial Day barbecue at his house for the Delray Misfits, which will feature pizza and prostitutes. Genova replies, "Oh boy, pizza!" But the Misfits don't let Jason off that easily: they are determined to get him laid at the party. Lou said that all the girls were fighting over the chance to take someone's virginity. Memorial Day arrives, and Jason decides to honour dead war heroes by banging some dirty whores. Instagram and YouTube videos surface of him sucking on their breasts and slapping their asses. He claims that he finally lost his virginity at the party to two Cuban hookers and a black hooker. He says that he tried to lick one's ass, but she wouldn't let him. The rest of the Misfits back up Jason's claim that he lost his virginity, but some Genova's Witnesses are skeptical in the absence of clear evidence, even if Jason and the hooker went into a room together for 4 minutes. It's possible that, to Jason, sucking on a tit = losing virginity (similar to how he thinks taking useless testosterone boosters from GNC = taking testosterone). Other Witnesses believe that the Delray Playboy does indeed have the unmistakable post-sex afterglow. There are rumours that there is an actual video of Jason banging the whores, as well as a second Big Lenny sex tape, but they haven't been released yet. (Breast sucking and ass slapping) | (Announcement of virginity loss) | (Funny Instagram poll held by Jason)

-Jason gets a shady new manager with a criminal record. He tells Jason to make a video where he "Order 66s cancer," starting a GoFundMe to supposedly buy lightsabers for kids with cancer. It quickly gets reported as a scam and is taken down. (Order 66 cancer)

-Jason announces that the July 4 bodybuilding show against Average Rich in Venice Beach has been cancelled. There was some kind of misunderstanding, because Average Rich paid for Jason's hotel room but NOT his flight, what an asshole. Average Rich is now stuck with a hotel reservation that he can't cancel. M'Jew says that Average Rich is a nice guy but makes bad decisions. No arguments here. They might be postponing their showdown until next year, opening up the possibility that Witnesses will be subjected to the horror of hearing, "Average Rich, you're goin down, pinworm!" for a whole additional year.

-Coath Ian McCarthy reveals that he's broke, his coaching business is floundering, and he flunked all his classes because he suffers from crippling depression. He also broke up with his girlfriend. Feel cold, fans. Down dumps. He opens up a GoFundMe begging for $4,000 to pay for his psychiatrist and drug stack. He takes Andrew's advice to use the money on a vacation to get away from all the stress for a while, and unexpectedly books a flight to Delray Beach, celebrating Independence Day with the gang. Ian says that he was so deliriously happy while working out with the Piss Lord that he hugged him afterwards. It's fascinating how Nate despises Jason so much that he ignores all his phone calls and shits on him nonstop when he's on the Delray Misfits podcast; on the extreme other end of the spectrum, we have Ian McPopTarts, who enjoys being around Genova so much that he sought to hang out with him as a means to cure his depression. He talks about the possibility of staying with Jason for a few months next year to coath him for the Ruby. (Ian and the Delray Misfits celebrate Independence Day)

-Lord Vader begins selling Order 66s on Instagram for as little as ten buck. Trolls go on a buying spree where they direct Genova to read racist statements. The joke's on them, though, because Genova is so illiterate that he ends up butchering them all, so, "Order 66 Indian people for smelling like curry" ends up as, "Order 66 Indian people for smiling on on on people." An attempt to make him say, "Order 66 Chinese people" ends up as, "Order 66 cheese people." It's a mystery if Genova is truly this illiterate or if he's actually smarter than people think and is intentionally trolling the trolls after taking their money. (One of the botched Order 66s)

-Jason losing his virginity is confirmed real and the sex tape is discovered to actually exist after Lou threatens to release it if Jason doesn't pay him back some money for something. Brief clips come out of Jason making hilarious dirty talk with the prostitutes, like declaring that he's a "hard cummer" and yelling, "Fuck you, bitch!" while getting a blowjob. Jason later makes a video where he hands over $4,000 to Lou for the sex tape and $40 for "peptides." Lou seems like he's high on coke or something with his eyes bugging out of his head and he doesn't blink a single time during the whole video. The whole money exchange seems like some stupid skit, like the Jonny Fitness fake tattoo, because there's no way that the Iron Jew would give $4,000 to anybody other than an imaginary girl, but it may have arisen out of a real dispute. It might be some kind of weird mutually beneficial arrangement where Lou gets to wash his hands of Jason's sex tape being leaked in exchange for feeding Jason's delusions that he's a mellonaire (he's been making multiple videos showing off stacks of fake $100 bills that say, "For motion picture use only" if you look really closely).

-The Delray Misfits hold a GoFundMe so everybody can take a trip to Las Vegas (including Andrew Collura) in September to attend Mr. Olympia. Jason is excluded from the fundraiser though, with the Misfits reasoning that he claims to be making tons of money off his YouTube channel and always flaunts his (fake) money, so he should be able to pay for himself. Jason solves the problem by extorting Jonny Bravo to take him and pay for his hotel. Jason's mom the Gain Goblin only allows him to go if she gets to come along. Jason claims that he'll be a special guest at's booth, which is ironic since they're the ones who banned the Jason Genova thread on the Misc and exiled all the Genova's Witnesses, but in recent months they've finally allowed another thread to exist. They even sent a huge package of supplements to appease The Lord. A lot is riding on this Mr. Olympia trip, with both Jason's and the Delray Misfits' channels being slow for months now. This might be the last test to see if The Ment is truly dead. ('s pology assepted several years after the Poonycheeps incident)

-Jonny Bravo basically just gives Jason and his mom the money for the Vegas trip and bails on babysitting them. Jason wastes the whole Vegas trip as he does the exact same thing he did back in Florida: badgering his mother to buy him "ice water" at Starbucks and sounding like a spoiled 17th century aristocratic child when demanding she buy him new shoes at the outlet mall. "I need them, mother. My shoes are horribly worn!" Jason wanted to go to the Pawn Stars store and sell Chumlee his PJ Braun red speedos for 5,000 buck, but he ends up just taking a picture of the shop from the outside. PJ Braun is manning the Blackstone Labs booth at the Mr. Olympia expo, but he says he shooed Jason away when he tried to talk to him and can't associate with him anymore because his staff will mutiny if he lets Jason into the Blackstone Labs building anymore. For the most part, the Delray Misfits do their own thing away from Jason but didn't fare much better, with the highlight of their trip being a dull excursion to the Hoover Dam; Lenny refused to go because it was a cookie cutter Brady Bunch activity. He later mocks Brad on the podcast for dragging everyone to the Hoover Dam because even in the 1960s people knew it was lame (referencing a Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C. episode). Jay Masters went to the dispensary and bought a large piece of marijuana chocolate that was meant for like 4 people. He got scared of it melting in the van so he ate the entire thing in one go and could barely function. As such, the long awaited confrontation between him and PJ Braun just consisted of the two awkwardly staring at their phones. (Lenny going on a hilarious rant mocking Brad's insistence on visiting the Hoover Dam)

Andrew and Jason return to the Jewish House of Horrors a.k.a. Jane's Halloween party. It's not as menty as previous incarnations (especially since Jay Masters was banned from it), but a drunk Jane dressed up like a cowgirl does attempt to hit on Andrew and goes around telling the men at the party that she needs a horse and that she wants to ride them. Jason also dresses up like Anakin Skywalker and tells his mother, "Kneel before me, ya hoe!" (Jane's Halloween Party 2018)

-Some Australian guy pulls one of the funniest trolls in a long time when he convinces Janoy that he works for Disney and is offering him a minor movie role in the next Star Wars movie, but he needs to lose some weight for it. He tells Jason that he's going to be a Jedi who is killed off by a Sith lord. Reminiscent of George Costanza perfecting his one line of: "These pretzels are making me thirsty," Jason struggles to stutter out his one line of: "No! Please spare me, my lord. I pledge myself to the dark side of the force. Give me mercy! NOOOOOOOO!" (Janoy Cresva's pissening audition tape)

-Another major scandal rocks the Genovaverse involving fans being scammed out of money. Oh, no, no; for once, it doesn't involve Jason. It actually involves the Delray Misfits! The Misfits announce that they're going to be opening up a Patreon where people can watch videos in exchange for a monthly fee to fund more things like the Vegas trip. At first, people don't really mind because they figure that it will just supplement the regular YouTube channel with bonus ments. However, it soon becomes clear that it's actually replacing the YouTube channel entirely, so ments are now behind a paywall. This is unusual given that the quality of Delray Misfits videos is lower than it's ever been, and yet people are now being charged for them. Nevertheless, they get a large amount of patrons contributing a total of over $2,000 a month, and people begin to question why they need that much money to fund videos. Lenny gets fired from his hospital job after word gets out about his tranny sex tape (he should sue them for discriminating against an LGBTQ black man). Brad responds to angry fans who don't like the Patreon by claiming that most of the money will be going to help out Lenny.

-However, Lenny gets taken to the emergency room after he overdoses on GHB (again), and he lets it slip that Lou has actually been paying him $1,200 a week for only working 4 hours a day. In other words, it's basically charity, so Lenny is certainly not hard up for money. A massive backlash ensues against the Misfits for inducing people to pay money by claiming that it was going to provide Lenny with necessities of life, not recreational drugs, strip clubs, tranny hookers (which he has been indulging in uncontrollably as of late), and Andrew and Brad's child support. To make matters even worse, people who try to call out the Misfits on Instagram are responded to with taunting comments from the Delray Misfits account that they don't have to explain to anybody where the money is going. Andrew and Brad attempt to blame Pomps, some cookie cutter who is apparently Brad's childhood friend (which is weird since Brad is 39 and Pomps looks like he's 60) who tagged along with them during the Vegas trip. They had enlisted him to help run the Patreon. In an unexpected turn of events, public opinion of the Misfits plummets while affection for Genova skyrockets since he at least admits to being a greedy scammer and lets people watch his shit videos for free. Could this be the beginning of Jason Genova's redemption arc?

Revenge of the Piss (November 2018 - present)

-The Delray Misfits shut down their Patreon in wake of the scandal, and they essentially stop making videos. Focus shifts again to Jason's channel as Andrew expresses a desire to help Jason film gym videos for his channel like the olden days. Fans are mildly amused by Jason's new obsession with the word "unfortunately" despite clearly not knowing what the word means. "After I become a big movie star I'll be quitting my job at Publix, unfortunately." "Just believe in yourself, unfortunately." "Hey fans, today is gonna be a great day, unfortunately."

-Another troll tells Jason that he knew Natalie Portman before she was famous and they're willing to come over to his house for an interview. As usual, Brad tries to convince Jason that he's being trolled, but he insists that it's real and makes a bet with him, agreeing to take him out for a $50 steak dinner if it's fake. To avoid paying, Jason pretends to conduct a farcical interview with an off-camera Natalie Portman. "I'm gonna answer you some questions." --Jason Genova (Jason Genova's exclusive interview with the one and only Queen of Naboo)

-Future IFBB pro Jason Genova, inspiration to millions around the world, announces that his lofty goal is to "get below 20% body fat and look okay."

-Brad's phone is blown up once again as fans text him about Genova's newest catfish incident: he was apparently tricked into jacking off then eating his own cum on camera. Hue hue hue, jus a lil treat, don't be mad Skip. When Brad confronts Jason about this, Genova responds, "That was a year ago!" There's a second allegation that he shoved a cucumber up his ass. Knuckle Deep denies that it's his ass in the photo. He claims the evidence that exonerates him is that the ass in the photo has hair on it, in contrast to his own ass, which is hairless.

-Jason obtains permission to start filming at LA Fitness and begins the hugely successful "Freakier By The Day" series. It sparks a minor ment renaissance as it's the closest thing in a long time to the old school Delray Misfits gym videos, and fans appreciate that things are returning to the basics rather than gimmicky trips to Las Vegas. Popular running gags of the series include Jason enraging Brad by blowing him kisses and Jason's new catchphrase, "Whooooooooooo caaares" (an evolution of his old "who cares about _____, we're freaks!" catchphrase). (Freakier by the Day with Brad and Lenny)

-Delighted by the popularity of Freakier by the Day, Jason starts up another new series, "Bulkin' for Freaks," because if there's one thing that Genova needs to further his bodybuilding career it's to look like even more of a fat tub of whale shit than he already does. His delusions simply have to be seen to be seen to be believed. (Bulkin' for Freaks)

-In a Freakier By The Day episode, Brad asks Janoy what he would name his kid if he had one. He answers, "Schlemp Genova."

-A fan named Salvatore sends all the Delray Misfits gifts except for Jason, whom he instead sends a note that reads, "Dear Jason: drop dead." (Jason and the Misfits open their gifts from Salvatore)

-The legendary Coath Adam Harper finally returns in a reunion video. His thumb was comically torn off during a recent boating accident. He puts Jason through another gym workout like old times. Jason does his usual Oscar-winning performance of collapsing and pretending to be on the verge of vomiting, so Adam offers The Iron Jew $20 if he completes the set of squats and burpees. He makes a miraculous recovery and hurries over to the squat rack faster than when there's a cucumber sale at Aldi, and he finishes the sets with ease. (Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3)

-Jason does another fan meetup event at the Kavasutra bar and signs autographs for Genova's Witnesses. He attempts to write "YouTube celery" on one autograph, but it looks more like "Fat tub cell." (Meet and greet with The Lord)

-Jason does a workout video with a girl named Synthia, whom he met at the Kavasutra bar a couple years ago during the Star Wars orgy. She was instantly attracted to Fat Tub Cell after he showed her his sickening subscriber count. Jason quickly begins claiming that she's his new girlfriend but that she told him she can't have sex until she gets married. She lets him slap her ass and even simulates giving him a blowie while he does a set of chest presses. Schlemp may have finally found a mother. (First video with Synthia)

-In a hilarious twist, Witnesses recognize a tattoo on "no sex before marriage" Synthia's leg and discover that she was the porn star Alicia Tease. Jason has been friendzoned by a girl with an extensive catalogue of being gangbanged, pissed on, and facefucked. The Grand Canyon is closed, unfortunately. To further add onto the drama, Jason is also doing videos with another girl from the Kava bar named April who turns out to be an underaged runaway. Jason had slapped her ass in a video. When confronted about this, m'pedo pleads ignorance and says he thought she was a "dorf." (April the teenage runaway)